Written By: Cathy Shuba
"Happy Sunday!"
Eighteen years ago I never thought I would be writing this post today. Eighteen years ago I never thought I would be enjoying the super bowl game without alcohol. Eighteen years ago I never thought it was possible to go to a super bowl party without engaging in alcohol, having a hangover the next day or even remembering who won or lost. Eighteen years ago I was a mess spiritually, mentally and physically! Can you relate?
I awoke this morning with gratitude. I awoke with no fear this morning! I awoke this morning thanking God I never chose to work against him and that I have always been willing to let go and let God,...do his will and not mine. I awoke this morning with faith! I awoke this morning reflecting on the days I first became sober and how hard it was for me to attend parties and the thought of the Holidays or celebrations such as the Super Bowl brought on anxiety and fear. Today, I look to all I once feared and welcome it with my faith. My faith today allows me to have many strengths, in so many ways in my life.
Sober Bowl Sunday I will be celebrating today. Yes, I know it is the "Super" Bowl and it is not Super Bowl 18, but I look at it as a "Sober" Bowl instead. What helped me overcome my fears, anxiety and uncertainty when it came to such celebrations? What team did I play on? Who won at the end? Let me explain, for me, it took a lot of work on my part, meaning I needed to work on what I feared and what caused me anxiety in order to have strength. I needed to walk through my fears and not bypass them as though I never saw them or realized them. I needed to choose to see my denial, work through my denial and get to a point in my life where I saw denial as not an option anymore but toxic in my recovery. Denial kept me toxic and gave me even more fear in my life. I needed to pick which team I wanted to be on, in order to continue to be sober. I chose the winners, meaning the winners where the one's who went to meetings, wanted a recovery full of love, wanted contentment, wanted independence in their recovery and for those who avoided and did not control others in order for them to feel good in there recovery. I needed to be honest with myself whenever I started to feel not safe, not secure or not content. In other words, if you are new in your recovery and are feeling this way, I suggest you figure out another plan in order to keep yourself true and sober. The choice is yours, but in the long run you will find you will always be on the winners team if you follow your gut feeling rather than your guilt feeling. I needed to learn how to say NO without guilt or explanation. I needed to tend to my fears in order to have a freeing recovery. I needed to write my fears down, dissect them and figure out what caused it, how to deal with it and what was the end result for me spiritually, mentally and physically whenever I chose to deal with my fears instead of denying or ignoring my fears. I needed to truly work on my spiritual well being in order to have faith, feel my faith and live in my faith. Not just walk around saying I have faith in God, but really I never felt it and walked with it on a daily basis. I needed to do so many things in order for me to once again enjoy the Super Bowl game sober without fear of using. Even though I have been sober for over 18 years now, I still humble myself with compassion, reality and gratitude in order to realize who I am and what I can be if I do not remain mindful of my limitations. I have come a long way and still continue to be mindful of my limitations but the most important choice I made was to stick with the winners. The team of winners have never let me down, always supported me and have always been there when I needed them. I will always be on the winners team!
Are you planning a "Sober" Bowl party today? Perhaps attending one? If so, I hope you keep in mind what I shared today about sticking with the winners team in order to remain mindful of your recovery and the fears you may face in your life or in your recovery! Know and realize you have a choice and with that choice you make will be your end result. Many Blessings, my friends!
Today, I will run with the winners and know I have come a long way in order to feel this way, live this way and know that when I chose to live this way I chose to have many gifts in my life! Happy No Fear "Sober" Bowl Sunday to all!
