"Happy Friday!"
Today I would like to talk about minding my own business. Today I would like to talk about my life when I mind my own business. Today I must always mind my own business. What is my business? My business is me and my kids well being. My business is my health and my kids health. My business is my blog and all the writing I share with all of you through my own experiences, strengths and hopes. My business is my own mental, physical and spiritual well being. My business is how I practice and work my recovery on a daily basis. My business is my feelings towards things and how I need to deal with things. My business is how I choose to live today. My business is how I feel about my religion, my political views and how I raise my kids. My business needs to stay focused on all these things in order for me to stay focused. In order for me not to fix other people. In order for me not to forget about my needs. In order for me to not loose my serenity over someone else issues. In order for me to remember I am important and I need to help me first. In order for me to stop trying to control or tell others how to live just because I am uncomfortable about the situation. In order for me to know who I am, what I like and why I need to stay focused on my business.
When I was drinking my business was everyone's business. I would have about 6 or 7 beers and start talking to everyone and anything about my problems. Come to think about it...it sounds like my blog without the alcohol! Oh well, at least I am sharing my experience, strength and hope in a positive way and not in a selfish, self seeking and irrational way. When I was drinking I also thought that if someone was talking about me that it automatically was my business. This was none my business! When I was drinking I thought that if you said something that I disagreed with it was my business. This was none of my business! When I was drinking at a party or family function I thought it was my business to control the conversation of debate, talk louder than you because my way was the right way whatever the topic was of discussion and feel that if I was invited I was entitled to make whatever was going on in the room my business. This was none of my business! When I was drinking and saw a fight break out in a bar I thought it was my business to either break it up or engage in it. This was none of my business! When I was drinking whenever there was a family debate going on I thought it was my business to fix it, people please whoever at the time I was trying to please and try to teach the family member how to feel and how they should really act. This was none of my business! I am sure there are more "none of my business examples" but for now those are the ones I most struggled with. However, it was not always when I was drinking that these situations had arise in my life. I was sober for quite some time before I realized my behavior. It was not until I went to Al-Anon that I learned to mind my own business. I am so grateful for this wonderful program and helping me have such a balanced and serene sobriety today.
Today I know different. Today I know when it is my business. Today I know when to engage in a conversation and when not too. Today I know when to involve myself in a situation and when not too. I know this today and sometimes may forget and get involved in something that is none of my business which is the result of not feeling good about myself, feelings of aggravation, uncertainty and loss of control. I had to choose to learn how to engage in ONLY my business. I had to want to have the desire to not engage in other peoples business even if it was family. My family was the biggest problem to me when I practiced my own business and not everyone else. My family did not understand the importance or reasons why I choose to live in my to live own business. My family tried to guilt me or is still trying to guilt me into thinking and doing what they think I should do. This is none of their business. This also, only makes the situation worse and again gives no solution or harmony to the problem. I can not explain this to my family and some friends that do not in their own life practice this themselves...it is impossible and again it is none of my business why they think this way. When I engaged in other peoples problems, issues and situations I felt drained, frustrated, sad, depressed, sometimes angry and resentful. I wanted to have peace. I wanted to have serenity. I wanted to mind my own business. Take what you like and leave the rest....as a wise friend of mine told me and still tells me today in order for me to take what I like and leave it to their own business of how they think, see things, cope with things and deal with things. This allows me to have peace and serenity in my life. This helps me to stay on my own side of the street. This helps me to stay focused. This helps me to mind my own business. Do you mind your own business? Do you find this difficult to do? If so, write down a list a things that you know you have control over and then you will eventually understand what is truly your own business. Today, I will run with my peace in knowing my own business and not have to worry about other people's business.
Sobriety Fitness by Cathy Shuba is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
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