The pain of last year is still fresh. Texting my friend saying I am dying is still fresh in my mind. Her words of encouragement still uplifting. The tears as I crossed the finish line and huddled against the wall for a few minutes still sting with the thoughts running through my mind....this is my second slowest marathon ever!
Let's take the Honolulu Marathon out of all of this and just look at this course. Last year was my third time to run it. I have done it each year from my first marathon in 2011. My times have been 4:46:40, 4:36:16, 4:39:46. I have a smart coach who recently pointed out to me that last year my time was only about 3 1/2 minutes off. Oh...in my mind it was so much bigger.
Negative thoughts are powerful and they can take hold of you...myself included. I have been told I am always so positive. Well, sure. I'm positive when I am not beating myself up unnecessarily. I can give into negative thoughts just as well as anyone else but I strive to not let them take hold of me.
Like today. I was at work feeling tired. I could barely hold my eyes open. My head was pounding and I was thinking all kinds of pitiful thoughts until it hit me. Why am I doing this to myself? If I think I am tired, I will feel tired. If I tell myself I will get over it, I will get over it. And I did.
Weekly miles starting 3/3/14
Running is a mental game as well as a physical game. I have been running hard and training well. Do I wish I could do more? Always. Have I done better than ever before? Yes. Am I tired? Yes. And that is okay.Last week I ran a few less miles than I should have according to my plan. I have no regrets. I was tired and mentally fatigued. I needed to rest. Saturday I ran my long run of 16 miles and realized my dinner the night before was a mistake. I couldn't fuel on my run. I took no gels and drank limited sports drink. Thank goodness I was at home running on the treadmill due to necessary pit stops. It took a lot out of me but I got it done and I am stronger because of it.
T-27 days. Race day is just around the corner. I will focus on getting my mental game in check and I will continue to sneak in some extra go to bed early nights. Sorry dear hubby. I am tired. I need sleep.
Daily Gratitude: I am thankful I can run.
Daily Affirmation: My mental game is getting stronger each and every day!