This week, Husband and I are leaving the kids behind with my parents and jetting off to Japan. Now before anyone starts saying they’re jealous, I have to say that these 8 days will be our only days in 365 days that we have alone. We do not get to even go out for lunch sans kids now so when you put it in perspective, I would say it’s good and I appreciate it but just hold your horses on the envy (I do not like making people feel envious!) ;) (Ok, I do know some people say they never ever even have 8 days sans kids in a year.. but comparisons aside…)
Our family has always had a rather unique arrangement due to work, visas and whatnot. At one point, it was just Husband and Ally living in Australia while I was living in Singapore. At another point, it was just Ally and me in Singapore. At yet another point, it was Ally, me and baby-in-womb in Sydney while Husband worked in Darwin.
Having endured periods where we were separated, you’d think that leaving our kids behind would be much easier. In fact, the added lure of kids-free-adventures make it seem like a complete no-brainer.
Yet every time, we are surprised by how hard it is to leave our kids behind.
We do enjoy our time with no kids, just being ‘young’… pub-hopping (we absolutely dig good live bands)… actually holding hands and strolling around (barely hold hands these days as there’re always strollers, bags, kids’ hands to hold)… having no fixed plans for the day… eating when we feel like it (no “MUM I’M HUNGRY” whinging)… eating whatever we feel like… sleeping whenever we want… no kid wrangling/bribing/arguing about teeth cleaning or weeing…
Yet when the time comes to give our little ones a hug and say ‘see you in 8 days’, it’s always done with a little tingly soreness in the heart.
I know we will be thinking about our little ones all the time.
Parenthood is such an amazing journey in that way. The ties that truly bind. You could be far away physically yet still feel so entirely connected to your children. How is that even possible? You might not exactly pine for them as you do still enjoy your time away.
But they lurk around in your thoughts… in a nice way.
They float around in your conversations… somehow.
You think about their smiles and laughter. You wonder what they’re doing now. You think about their peaceful countenances as they sleep. Their little smiles. How they smell. How adorable they are.
I’m one of the first amongst my friends to have kids and for a long time, my friends understandably could never understand (yes, a repetitive tongue-twister there). A well-meaning friend said to me that I should take my mind off my kids when I’m out. I wasn’t even talking about them. She just saw ‘them’ in my eyes. I tried to explain they hang around in my heart, all the time… but no, not in a bad way. Not a tiresome, over burdening way. Just a nice, sweet, beautiful love that is ever there. A love that does not take a break, not even when we’re on holiday.
Have you left your kids for a prolonged period? How did you feel?
Linking up with Essentially Jess for IBOT!
photo credit: dhammza // cc
