Well I am awaken again in the middle of the night by my neighbors television in sheer panic, except for this time instead of flight I woke up in fight mode.
I was jolted up out of bed with angry Adrinalin in a half awake stuper. It felt as if electricity zapped my body. My heart racing in rage.
On a positive note I relized why I have been so incredibly depressed that I have shut down for months on end . The answer is rage.
I had no idea I was so darn angry. So many years of pent up anger:
I am so angry at men. My father was the most inconsiderate human being . He would chew with his mouth open and talk insesantly and even breath loud because he was always following me around the house like a creep.
From a young age I was not allowed to be angry and was not shown how to express my emotions. So instead I stuffed every irritation and my system would shut down.
I still feel really mad!!
I need to deal with this anger
God help me forgive because I can’t on my own
I need to learn how to be more assertive about the things I need. So people don’t walk all over me.
To stand up for myself
To be more confident in what I do
To be more active to help get out my pent up nerves, maybe join a class of some sort like dance
What are coping mechanisms you use for anger management ?
Stay strong ♡ your not alone
Xoxo
