Humor Magazine

Will Someone, Anyone, Please Say Something Nice About Mr. Sepp Blatter

By Davidduff

Take that as a 'no', shall I?  Well, in that case I will because no-one outside of an Auschwitz Camp commandant can be all bad;  surely, everyone has one tiny bit of good in them somewhere even if finding it is like looking for a Higgs Bosun particle.  Mr. Blatter, as we all know, do we not?, is the 'Mr. Biggie' of international football.  For what seems like the entire history of the game he has presided over the global competition that leads eventually to the World Cup.  He has managed this, and now intends to stand yet again for a further term, despite the stench of corruption forcing people to clench their teeth to avoid gagging whilst simultaneously several tons of opprobrium are tipped over him by the media of the free world rather like a council refuse truck emptying its contents at the end of a busy day.

Well, I am not going to attempt to deny all those accusations but I do want to try and find just one good thing to say about dear old 'Seppy-baby'.  It took some finding, I admit, but here it is: some years back Sepp Blatter was the leader of another international body, the 'We Love Suspenders Society'.  Now, Gentlemen (it's no good asking the ladies!), who would not have supported such an organisation had we known of it back in the day?  Alas, I cannot claim to be an expert in the field - not that it wasn't for lack of trying - but I am of an age and generation that lived through the great transition from suspenders to tights.  Let me tell you younger chaps, tights were, are and always will be an abomination!


Will someone, anyone, please say something nice about Mr. Sepp Blatter
Will someone, anyone, please say something nice about Mr. Sepp Blatter

   Tight tights   A tight git   Suspended bliss

This is, of course, a blog of the highest possible taste and discernment and so it is difficult for me to find the correct word to sum up what makes one piece of ladies' wear attractive to men whilst the other is detested but I think the word I am looking for is accessibility!  Need I say more?  Didn't think so!  'Sepp-baby' might well be a total Swiss swindler when it comes to dodgy deals with international football federations but when it comes to women's underwear he was spot on!

(By the way, I must now go and lie down.  Looking through all those sites for suitable images to illustrate this post has left me tired and emotional - and I don't mean Sepp Blatter's picture - which is not surprising when you realize I have been looking, er, conscientiously for six and a half hours!  Honestly, you have no idea the sacrifices I make to bring you all the very latest news and views - pheeeeeeeeew!)

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