Humor Magazine

Will Somebody Please Superglue 'Dim Dave' to His Deckchair on the Beach!

By Davidduff

When 'Dave' purses his little lips, furrows his brow and starts dashing back to London it's time to dig in, break out the emergency rations and rediscover your faith in God!  I must ask my faithful readers a question: apart from his in-action in leaving Michael Gove alone to fight through with his education reforms, is there any serious decision that 'Dave' has made which indicates that he has even the tiniest amount of good judgment?  From high speed trains to nowhere, to windmills ruining 'this green and pleasant land' and producing just enough electricity to make a cup of tea, to dishing out zillions in dosh to kleptocracies like Nigeria, to aircraft carriers with no aircraft, and so on ad infinitum and ad nauseum, the only thing the wretched man shows a talent for is making the wrong decisions. 

Today he's dashing back to London, full of self-importance, convening his national security committee (that's a laugh, for a start!) and is positively panting to trot along behind one of the most stupid and malignant  American presidents I have known in my lifetime.  Obama, to quote a phrase, 'wouldn't piss on us if we caught fire' because he detests Britain, and yet here is Cameron acting like his poodle.  Obama made what could be the biggest mistake of his misbegotten life when he talked about red lines in Syria.  Well, allegedly someone in Syria just dumped poison gas all over his nice new red lines and now he looks like a black Gary Cooper walking the walk down Main Street with his six shooter on his hip to face the bad guys.  What will he do, we wonder, shoot himself in the foot perhaps?  Well, "frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn" because it's none of our business so we should just stay firmly on the side lines, perhaps waving the stars and stripes but no more.

If 'Dave' does recall parliament then I hope the sensible Tories give him a hammering and try to knock some sense into him.


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