Humor Magazine

What a Pathetic Bunch of Dutiful Poodles!

By Davidduff

On and off yesterday, but mostly off, I half-watched the President of France dodge the softest, easiest press love-in I have ever seen.  The French press are beyond pathetic, they are supine, arse-licking poodles who make the majority of the American media which likes to regularly roll over and have its tummy tickled by Obama look like a real hound dog by comparison.  What is the use or purpose of a press which fails to always treat politicians as the enemy.  Paxman had it right when he told us that when interviewing a politician he always wonders, "Who is this person and why is he lying to me?"  For a superb report on this orgy of mutual love, look no further than Quentin Letts in today's Mail.  Mind you, in Hollande's favour it has to be said that he is only following the finest traditions of high office in France, as Patrick Marnham reminds us at The Coffee House:

Twenty years ago President Mitterrand was still employing a squad of security police to conceal the existence of his secret lovechild, Mazarine. Ten years ago President Chirac was still cruising around Paris in his limo being dropped off at various addresses by his chauffeur, the faithful Jean-Claude, who nicknamed him ‘Monsieur Ten Minutes Maximum (including the shower)’. Five years ago President Sarkozy, one year after being elected, had survived divorcing his wife (who had complained to the police about physical mistreatment), and subsequent re-marriage with an Italian folk singer. None of them was in the slightest bit perturbed in their public duties by any of this.

France is finished, or perhaps, putting it more crudely but in the circs more appropriately, France is fucked!  The only good this man is doing is demonstrating to the world that socialism in practice doesn't work.  I sincerely hope that this man continues with his malignant policies, which now include a desire for state-backed euthanasia, and that eventually as France reverts to the only thing they are really good at - revolution - they will haul this nasty little man away and guillotine, if not his head, then some other suitable part of his anatomy pour encourager les autres!


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