Humor Magazine

The Sunday Rumble: 11.8.13

By Davidduff

Wallender is a wanker!  Sorry, sorry, that's rather rude but I'm in a grumpy mood this morning.  Actually, my irritation should be aimed at BBC4, hitherto, one of my favorite TV channels, particularly on Saturday evenings when they run foreign police stories which are usually interesting and at their best (The Killing - first series) are brilliant.  However, for the last several centuries - at least, that's what it feels like - they have been running Wallender stories.  He must stand, or slump, as the most eye-stabbingly boring character ever invented.  So for week after week I have eagerly checked the listings and for week after week nothing but bloody Wallender until this week - hoorah! - another 'Yerdy-Durble-Burdle' police procedural but not Wallender.   Even so, warning bells rang because the lead character was played by the 'Yerdy-Durble' actor who played Wallender in the early series.  Anyway, generous to a fault I gave it a chance last night.  What a load of old komage, er, that's 'Yerdy-Durble' for 'tripe', by the way.  The actor concerned is old, fat, unshaven and looks like an unmade bed and yet he is supposed to be a wow with the ladies.  Do me a favour!  I know some 'wimmin' are stupid but but not that stupid!  I'm the really stupid one for wasting an hour and half of my precious life watching this lumbering slob plod through a plot of totally unbelievable complexity.  And yes, I do feel better for sharing that, thank you for asking!


Stephen Fry: nice guy, pity he's so dim:  Actually, I have no idea whether or not he's nice.  Like the rest of you I can only judge these 'slebs' on their public personna which is a bit like some punter, back in the day, judging one of my old bits of 'shrapnel' by the nice paint job I gave it!  Anyway, he obviously took Cameron's recent campaign in favour of homosexual marriage seriously and asked him to back a boycott of the Russian Olympics because of the anti-homosexual laws laid down by their Thugocracy (sole prop: Vlad the Impaler.)  Given the tiny number of homosexuals there are in this country compared to the hoardes of 'hearties' who follow these ridiculous games, poor Stephen - such a darling boy - was on an even bigger loser than our winter Olympic team.


More rumbles later  . . .



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