Skinny, You Will Be Mine!!!

Losing weight is so difficult, its the hardest thing ive ever tried to tackle. It just seems like a neverending journey that will never end. I am only human so ofcourse theres been times where i have got a little side tracked from the diet that i have been doing at that moment in time. I hate it when you get that comment from your skinny friend saying "Well if you really wanted it, you would put in the effort and lose the weight". When that happens all i want to do is scream in there face and jump up and down like a 3year old having a tantrum.
I want to be skinny more than anything in the world right now, infact its all i have wanted for a long time, and to be told that if i really wanted it i would put the effort in............skinny people just dont understand how difficult it is. It feels like a constant battle with myself that i am never going to win. And the results just seem to take ages to appear, and after all the effort i always seem to give in right before anything seems to really pay off. Yes i know i got myself into this position, and its only me that can get myself out of it, but because its such a time consuming thing, it gets difficult when you cant see the finish line anywhere in sight.
I think this is why i have never achieved my final goal of being a size 10 (UK 10). Ive always had my head set on being that size and that being my only goal, therefore no finish line in sight for a long time, infact its like im at my house waiting for my mom to pick me up to take me to the race. lol So this time i am now trying to take a different approach. I have set myslef plenty of goals that arent far from each other so once i have completed one, i have the next one to focus my attention on straight away.
Seeing everyday how you want to be by just people watching, looking at magazines, surfing the internet and watching movies, its a constant slap in the face, showing you what you want to be and what your not. It gets very depressing. But i can either always let it depress me and just continue to live my life the way i have been living it which isnt really living at all in my eyes, im just coasting through life at the moment, or i can suck it up and actually do something about. Achieve what i feel like is the impossible and be proud of myself, and go off into the world not afraid to do anything, be anyone who i want to be and wear whatever the hell i want to wear.
I just cant wait to be able to go into all the highstreet shops and instead of having to search all the racks for that odd one item that i will just be able to squeeze into, i will be able to pick up whatever i want to and most definitely fit into it and also look absolutely amazing in. Because i am told all the time "Oh you do have such a lovely face" atleast soon i will be able to have the body to match it. And when i do reach my final goal, all the goodlooking boys with amazing bodies will be mine to play with.