Humor Magazine

"Let's Kill All the Lawyers"

By Davidduff

Counsel for the prosecution, or defence (it depends who pays the most) addresses his Lordship:

I hasten to add, m'Lud, that of course I am not speaking for myself in my title above, nay, perish the thought, I am merely repeating the words of that rascally country bumpkin from Stratford-on-Avon whose infamous line regularly draws gales of laughter and even cheers from the groundlings whenever they are pronounced. 

I quite agree, m'Lud, shockin', shockin'! 

And even worse, the rogue scribbler dared to suggest that at night lawyers "straight dream on fees", as if such thoughts would cross our minds!

Well, of course they don't although you might have been tempted to think otherwise looking at this photo of lawyers on strike oops, sorry, not a strike because that would break their professional code (who sniggered?) so I suppose all we can call it is: 'not-a-strike'.  Anyway, yesterday they all walked out and stood around, hardly looking destitute any of them but especially the lady second in from the left who is carrying a Mulberry bag which sells, according to The Daily Mail, at a miserable £1,100!  (Well, at least she had the impeccable good taste not to buy a Michael Kors bag which is only fit for the purpose of lining your dustbin!)

Apparently this sort of demo went on all over the country yesterday as these over-priced poltroons whinged because their fees were being cut.  Who supplies the necessary dosh for their fees, well, me, actually, and you, of course, but I always like to think of these things from the personal point of view, as in 'me, me, ME!  I wish I'd known they were out on display, I could have armed myself with eggs and rotten veg and pelted the lot of them.  But on second thoughts, would any of them have agreed to defend me when I went up in front of the beak?  'Course they would, flash 'em a few readies and they'll 'smile and smile and murder as they smile' - that's a bit more Shakespeare, that is; see, you get your money's worth here so don't try suing this blog!

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