I only caught a glimpse of the tickertape on my mate Rupe's superb news channel but it was enough to make me head for my armchair via the drinks cupboard. Ed 'Milipede' has decided that when he is ruler of this 'septic Isle' he will give the vote to 16-year-olds! Is there no end to Labour chicanery? They import zillions of immigrants, then they make sure to employ as many people as possible on the government payroll, all this at our expense, but providing them with guaranteed votes. Now, the oily, conniving, little weasel is intending to bribe our 'youfs' and 'youfettes' by puffing up their wholly undeserved self-regard by giving them the vote. Doesn't he realize that most of them couldn't even manage to write an 'X' let alone read a ballot paper! And on top of that, he, 'Ed the Controller', is going to regulate the price of energy! Yes, despite half the world's oil and gas floating around the world's oceans in giant tankers whilst those rapacious middle-men bide their time and watch prices carefully so that they can unload at the very best price, 'Glottal-stop Ed' thinks he can beat them! All that will happen is that our energy companies will simply spend less on infrastructre and future investments like refineries and storage plants.
So if, quite rightly, you cannot stomach the 'Cleggeron', and 'Dim Dave' fails to inspire confidence, and you realize that the only sensible man in UKIP is Farage - the rest couldn't run a whelk stall - then vote Monster Raving Loony Party! Dammit, it's your duty!