Humor Magazine

Feeling Cheerful? I'll Soon Put a Stop to That!

By Davidduff

'Dave 'n' George' will no doubt enjoy laying into the 'Milipede' for his crass speech yesterday and the fact that, quite literally, he had nothing to say about our economy and the state of government finances.  However, they should be careful how they raise the subject because their own stewardship has been abysmal.  Today in The Telegraph, Mehreen Khan reports that the independent Office for National Statistics (ONS) has changed the way it tots up the true state of our public finances in order to make them more honest.  For just one example, Network Rail which has hitherto disguised itself as being in the private sector is now placed firmly, and more truthfully, as part of central government.  Oh, and by the way, doing that adds another $33 billion to government debt!

If there is anyone left in the country who believes that the hard-faced Tories have really slashed government spending and borrowing and reduced our national debt then he, she or it will be amazed (in fact they might drop dead with shock!) at this graph showing just how much we owe both before and after this honourable attack of statistical honesty:

Feeling cheerful?  I'll soon put a stop to that!

So, really getting a grip of things, are you, George, pressing on with all that austerity-not, are you?  Still, imagine, if you have nerves of steel, what that graph will look like after Ed Balls gets his feet under the Chancellor's desk!  One thing's for sure, I can't see him and the 'Milipede' putting up with an honest, truthful ONS for too long!


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