Would you recommend that a recovering alcoholic keep a six pack of beer around the house? Should a smoker who’s trying to quit keep a pack of cigarettes in his desk drawer? Should a video game addict keep his XBOX in the closet? Of course not, this is madness (No, This Is Sparta! (Sorry, I’m a giant nerd!)). Why would you keep your horrible addiction somewhere close by and convenient? Sure, it’s nice to think that our willpower is enough to keep us from relapsing but that’s not the case. Willpower is a fiction. Actually, let me correct that, will power “in the moment” is fiction. When that dopamine rush has you in its grips, you’re going to make decisions like a drunk person and we all know how drunk people make good decisions, right? (hint: they don’t). The same applies to food.
Now food is a special case because we obviously need to eat. However, there’s no reason to tempt ourselves more than we need to. For example, I have a horrible weakness for milk chocolate. I know for a fact that I can’t resist it. If it’s around me and easily accessible, I’m going to eat it. My brain may say no but my inner Grok is screaming out “YES!” And sooner or later, that inner Grok is going to win. I may justify it by telling myself I’ve been good the rest of the day or I’ll work out extra hard later, but the truth is that I’ll give in to Grok’s temper tantrum.
Stop Problems By Removing Temptation
I bring all this up because I was discussing eating with a woman who’s fighting a binge eating problem when she told me “I just can’t help it. My dorm room is filled with snacks and I can’t stop eating them.” To which my immediate response was “why the heck is your dorm room filled with snacks?” This is insanity and yet it’s something I hear over and over.
- “I just can’t stop eating when I go to a buffet…”. Well then, stop going to buffets!
- “I buy a large box of cereal but I find myself eating it all in one day…”. Then stop buying cereal!
- “It’s midnight and I’m heating up a frozen pizza…”. Why even have a frozen pizza in your house?
- “I ate that entire tub of ice cream!” Why did you buy a tub of ice cream in the first place?
Predictably Irrational
Dan Arielly in his book Predictably Irrational revealed that, when placed into situations of arousal, our brains end up making decisions they wouldn’t otherwise. This is perfectly in line with Kelly Mcgonigal’s The Willpower Instinct in which she discusses how a brain high on dopamine ends up making stupid decisions. Simply put, the primitive side of the brain will take over in moments when temptation is near. That primitive side wants nothing to do with restraint or good decision making. It wants satisfaction and it wants it now. Key word though, is “now“.
Faced with delayed gratification, Grok is not quite as persistent. That’s because Grok is lazy and short sighted. Grok isn’t capable of coming up with complex plans like “you should go to the store and pick up some donuts” but he’s perfectly capable of coming up with simple plans like “eat those donuts over there RIGHT NOW!” In fact, Grok isn’t really that smart at all. Without coming face to face with the donuts, Grok isn’t even going to crave them.
In other words, when it comes to fighting Grok’s basic insticts, you need to be smarter than Grok. You need to outwit him ahead of time and not wait until the moment of temptation under the assumption that willpower will win out. Sorry, but willpower will lose every time, brains and planning though, those are your weapons.
Make Your Decision Ahead of Time
The key to out thinking Grok is to think ahead of time. I know you think you can beat Grok through sheer willpower when you’re faced with temptation, but be honest, how often has that worked out for you in the past? Not too often I’d guess. On the other hand, how often have you fallen victim to a sudden craving to spend 30 minutes cooking a healthy meal from scratch? Pretty rarely. Which is why it’s far easier to live a healthy lifestyle when you’re not surrounded by unhealthy alternatives. Again, your inner caveman is lazy and does not think ahead. When faced with a complicated way to get his unhealthy reward, Grok is at a complete loss.
So…
- Do NOT have easily accessible snacks around the house.
- Do NOT put that pizza delivery coupon on the fridge door.
- Do NOT walk by the office kitchen where all the yummy snacks are.
- Do NOT go to a buffet.
This Also Applies To The Do’s
Just as Grok can be outplanned when it comes to what you shouldn’t do, he can also be outplanned when it comes to what you should do. For example, how often has Grok convinced you not to go to the gym? You may think it was your busy day or your tiredness or whatever excuse your rational brain came up with. The reality though is that your subconscious does not want you to spend calories. It believes calories are rare and effort should be minimized. It doesn’t understand our modern world. So again, you need to out think this primitive part of your brain and plan ahead.
- DO Put the workout on your calendar. That will make it harder to forget until it’s too late or avoid by working on something else.
- DO schedule a workout with other people. You’ll show up because you don’t want to disappoint them.
- DO find a gym close to home. You don’t want to make the commute an easy way for Grok to out think you.
- DO find a workout that works for you. It’s much more important to find a workout that you can stick with rather than an optimal one. Sure, Zumba might not be the best workout for your body but if you’re having fun and this will make you stick with it then it’s the best workout for you.
- DO pack your gym stuff ahead of time. In the morning rush, Grok will want you out the door and unable to exercise.
Again, think ahead. You’re smarter than Grok, but he’s louder and more insistent. Out think him by planning ahead and don’t rely on willpower in the moment to make your decisions.
