January to March was a time of happiness. A time of strengthening ties. That is what I thought at that time. Now that I look back, it was a time of mistakes. Mistakes that might haunt me for a long long time, mistakes that I really want to change. But then if there is one thing 2013 taught me that sometimes, even when you know its a mistake, you have to make it. April to June was the time of struggles and coping. Where January and April showed their true colours. When it became difficult to be alone with your thoughts and in the presence of your mind. For it formed shackles on me and my memories and bind the two of us together for moments of pain and torture. That is when you ask yourself whether it was worth it. And that’s when 2013 taught me its better to experience than to regret. when I told myself it was a mistake. “Yes its a mistake. And i know its a mistake. but there are certain things in life that you do mistakenly despite knowing that they are a mistake.”
Sometimes the best decisions are those that don't make sense. And this year I made those decisions. Over time and time again. July to September was a time of uncertainty and dreams. A time of many stupid decisions made in that state of that uncertainty. And thus, 2013 taught me the about the undefined abstract that is time. I learned that time is something very very funny and a little magical it can take stupid decisions and change that into something entirely different. And so one of those stupid decisions finally landed me somewhere where I became a step closer to my dreams.
October to December was a time of new beginnings. Of independence. Of Goodbyes. October to December was when 2013 taught me about destiny. And destiny is a funny thing. It happens whether you have planned it or not. And its something you can’t force. It will happen when it has to happen. And it gives you many lessons. It taught me that sometimes things have to fall apart to make way for better things. It taught me that we plan to control things around us, things that we want to make sense to us. You can ask the universe for all the signs you want but ultimately we see what we want to see when we’re ready to see it.
2013 was a year of friendships and mistakes. a year where I learned lessons and gained experiences. A year that showed me love and gave me a flavor of hate. a year that was my friend and at the same time my enemy. I don't know where I'm going to be in five years, and truth is I don't want to either. I want my life to be an adventure. I want 2014 to be an adventure. The future always seems scary and running back to the past seems easy because its familiar. The future is what we don't really understand and we fear whatever we don't understand. But there is a bigger story. A story that I'm yet to unravel in the coming year.
