The topic of this article causes me to do a bit of soul searching. Let me ask, have you ever wondered how many friends you think you’ll have in a lifetime? Not acquaintances, but true friends. I’ve thought about this often. In fact, as I get older, I find that real and genuine friendships are hard to come by. Sure, everyone has their own definition and criteria about what constitutes a “real and genuine” friendship, but for me, I believe that a key ingredient to the success of a friendship is reciprocation. Without each party contributing positively in one way or another, a friendship is not bound to last. Friendship is like marriage … it takes work. Because of this, I can count on one hand the number of true friends (excluding my husband and sisters) that I have. These partnerships are a big part of who I am and give my life added substance.
A few of my friends I’ve known for more than 20 years and some not as long, but no matter the length of time, all of these people have certain things in common – they support and listen to me when I need an ear; they are non-judgmental about the choices I make in life; they “pick me up” when I need a cheerleader; they make me laugh; they are loyal; they are truthful when I need advice; they are considerate, generous and kind; they are empathetic and sympathetic; and best of all, they are there for me through thick and thin and have given me some of the best memories of my life.
You know that you have a true friend when you haven’t seen or talked to that person in a few months or years and it still feels like no time has gone by when you connect again. A true friend is also someone you can “kiss and makeup” with after a disagreement without holding grudges. No one is perfect and we all make mistakes. So, when I or my friend can admit and take accountability for our actions and then be able to talk about it, this goes a long way in my book. And, when I say “talk”, I don’t mean texting, e-mailing or even having a phone conversation. It’s about face-to-face communication and the emotion behind it. This is all part of growing together… a never-ending commitment.
So, as my children get older and their friendships start to develop, it becomes increasingly important that they understand how friends should treat each other. This is a crucial life lesson that begins early on and continues into adulthood.
There are many qualities to being a TRUE FRIEND. And, the list doesn’t stop here. So ask yourself, are you one?
T – Trusting, thoughtful and tolerant
R – Respect
U – Understanding
E – Empathetic
F – Fun and faithful
R – Reliable and Rewarding
I – Involved
E – Endearing
N – Nice
D – Dedicated
S – Sympathetic and Supportive
H – Honest
I – Incredible
P – Pleasant, Promising and Perfect
Sometimes it takes a lifetime to discover who your true friends are, but as long as you do, that’s all that really matters, isn’t it?
Take the time and tell us about someone who is a true friend in your life. We want to hear about it.
