There is a lesson here in life that I learned a long time ago.
Your enemies are gone.
G – O – N – E gone.
They are dead to you for all intents and purposes, and that is how you need to treat them. Quit trying to suck up to your enemies and people who hate you.
I spent a good part of my life trying to get people who hated me to like me. I changed so many things about myself to try to meet their approval, and they just kept on hating me anyway. I finally realize that they had some deep inner need to hate me based on things that happened in the past or their own psychological bullshit. I figured a lot of this in years of therapy, which is one great thing about therapy. Therapy at the very least should enable you to figure out why things happened to you in life the way they did, why people behaved towards you the way they did, etc. After long therapy, your whole crazy life that never made much sense suddenly starts adding up. It’s all so logical.
You cannot win back your enemies.
I should spell that out letter by letter.
Once people start hating you, they’re pretty much gone forever. There have been a few cases in my life where they came back but not many. A recent case was my landlord. I was actually able to figure out why she hated me and why she stopped hating me.
There’s is something about humans that once they start hating you, they simply never stop and they keep hating you for the rest of their lives. Quit trying to get your enemies to love you. Your enemies are enemies. They quite literally hate you. In most cases, there is nothing you can do to win them back.
In a lot of cases, these people said they hate me for X reason. Well, I went and fixed the reason and they looked confused and shocked for a bit, and then they looked around and grabbed some new reason to hate me. I could literally see them looking around when I asked them why they hated me. They couldn’t think of a reason! They would look around a bit and then come up with some generic thing that I could not much change. It was obvious that they didn’t have much of a coherent reason for hating me!
I remember my father hated me for being a playboy and a womanizer as a young man. At some point that changed, and I went through a phase where I couldn’t get laid with God’s help. Then he hated me for never getting laid.
See?
He hated me for getting laid, and then he hated me for not getting laid.
This simply means that they hated me at some basic deep internal level for something that happened in the past or for their own hangups or even for a psychological need to hate someone.
Keep your friends close. There aren’t enough of them in this world.
Your enemies can go to Hell and burn there forever.
Quit trying to change to please them.
