Athletics Magazine

Trying to Be a Smart As Sh*t Athlete

By Brisdon @shutuprun

After 11 days of being a SASA (opposite of a DASA – you figure it out) and not running a single step, I went out for a short, slow, easy run. I’m not going to lie. I was scared. I so didn’t want ANY pain (info on my list of injuries HERE).

I know most of you have been there. You have a lot riding on whether or not pain rears its ugly, bastard head during a run or workout. There are two options:

  1. If there is pain, life sucks the big one.  It is the worst day. I probably should rest for a few more WEEKS, which means my early summer race goals are history. My life is over. I can’t face the pool everyday. Water running and swimming laps makes me want to strangle the lifeguard or the old guy who doesn’t wear a swim cap. I hate every runner I see on the road. Non-impact activities bite. Non-impact = non-fulfilling.
  2. If there is no pain, life is suddenly miraculous and wonderful. The sun is out! I love every person I meet! Can I buy you a cup of coffee? This means I can keep moderately training, holding this injury at bay while I get PT and a million other services that I can’t afford and don’t have time for. But, I will be running.

I ran three miles. There was pain. Not intense, awful pain, but nagging pain that should not be there and indicates I am far from healed. My gut is telling me I need to pull back. I hate being smart and sensible. It is no fun, it is boring, it is safe. But, if it means I can get better and get this crap resolved, I will do it.

PT doesn’t start for three weeks, that was the first available appointment. You bet your sweet ass I’ve been calling everyday to make sure I am on the cancellation list. I am a pushy injured runner, yes that is what I am. Squeaky wheel gets the grease. Annoying injured runner gets….the phone hung up on her?

Tonight I will watch the Biggest Loser finale and try not to think about injuries and how running and I are separated for a bit. If Conda wins I might strangle Allison Sweeney and the lifeguard at the pool. I know Conda has lost a lot of weight, but I just don’t like her. She and her bullying, finger waving attitude need to not be rewarded with a win. Just my two cents.

On a side note, I bet Dolvett never gets injured.  If I met Dolvett I would ask if he could rub my injury site.

I am having a bit of a bad and edgy attitude tonight. I’m sure you did not notice. Sometimes it is good to lose the “make lemonade” outlook and just bitch for a moment. Thanks for letting me do that. Please come back another day when I am more mature and sensible.

Who do you hope wins tonight? I hope it’s Kim. I think she’s played a good, solid game. Although something was fishy when she lost 15 pounds last week.

When was the last time you had a bitch-fest? Did it feel good? Before just now on this blog, my last bitch fest was when Sam borrowed my new shirt to dress up like a girl for a video he was making for school. He left all of his 14 year old B.O. in the shirt.



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