Athletics Magazine

Time for the Nursing Home?

By Brisdon @shutuprun

Today we had a 10 mile trail run on the agenda. I’m not gonna lie. It was hard. 1,700 feet of climbing in the first 5 miles. The wind was a bitch. The scenery was gorgeous. It took a long time and my body feels kind of beat up. Trail runs usually feel pretty good on my old bones, but after today’s run I felt like checking the vacancy at the nursing home or at least the assisted living center. I love a good bed pan! Depends are handy too.

Starting out seemed innocent enough:


Except that you can see where we are climbing. The first 2 miles are incredibly steep and rocky (8% grade).  We didn’t see any other runners out there, but tons of hard core mountain bikers who were all lifting their bikes over the rocks. We passed them on the way up. Not too often that it’s quicker to run than to bike.

Here comes my RP (running partner), Joie:


Once we crested the small mountain the wind was outrageous. We fought it and the climbing for the next 3 miles. At the risk of sounding like a wimpity wimp, we were really begging for the turn around point.  Here is Joie pretending she is not tired.


We passed this cool old cabin from the early 1900s where I went in to lay down, but the bed was too big and there was no porridge. Some girl with golden locks kept complaining, “Who has been sitting in my chair?” Who cares? Find another one.


I found myself wondering, “What kind of person builds a cabin up here? It is exposed, cold, windy, far away from Target and Starbucks (which I’m pretty sure they had in 1910), and nothing grows here. Plus, no cell service.”

There were tons of deer on this run. We kept repeating, “Look a deer!” like it was Johnny Depp (or Dolvett) or something. This one actually didn’t even startle when I took this up-close picture. She was probably thinking, “One step closer, bitch and I’m going all Bambi on your ass.”



The picture below was at the top. Nothing like climbing mountains in the mountains. After taking this picture we climbed the snowy peak in the background. It was only another 7,000 feet. Did you know if you say the word “orange” slowly it sounds like “gullible”?


And, that’s all she wrote. Today I was reminded that all runs are not created equal. As Joie said at one point, “I am as tired as a feel at the end of  marathon.” I think the combo of the climbing and the gusty, severe head-wind made for some tough going. Today was definitely the day to knock off the whining and to shut up and run and get it done.

Or, maybe we are just pussies who need to take up naked miniature golf.

{For the locals, this trail is at Hall Ranch. It is the Bitterbrush Trail leading up to the Nelson Loop}.

Now, I am drastically changing subjects. I was at Sport’s Authority yesterday looking at the clearance rack and saw this tennis dress.

Click here for enlarged image of Nike Smash Knit Dress - Womens Tennis Clothing - Cerise-Grid Iron-Grid


It was my size and so damn cute. I am a sucker for the ruffled skirt. I SO wanted to buy it to run in. I know it is for tennis, but I also know some runners wear tennis skirts to run in, so what’s the big deal? I actually do have a running dress from Skirt Sports that I love. Thoughts? I think the mountain bikers would dig it.

Or, maybe I’ll take up tennis just so I can wear it.

Do you ever have runs that mentally tax the crap out of you? What is the main factor: hills, weather or not maintaining the pace you want? All of the above. Any time I am giving it 100% exertion level over a longish period of time (2-3 hours), I am wiped.

Ever tried wearing a running dress? I wore one once in a half marathon (2009) and loved it. See? There I go.


Oh, and a winner!! The winner of the $100 Whole Foods Gift Card is #175 Meagan ([email protected]). The winner of the iTunes card is #55 Jenny Glade. Congrats and email me at [email protected] to claim your prize. Thanks to The Spinning Cook for hosting!


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