Reminders

Every time I smell hairspray
It reminds me of my dancing daysAnd ballet examsSpraying and lacquering our hair until it was rock hard
Every time I see tinfoilIt reminds me of smoking black tar heroinRunning the lighter under itUntil it melts and bubblesAnd the smoke wafts off it
Every time I eat a raspberry I am immediately transported back to my childhoodAnd the raspberry and red berry bush in our back gardenNever ending sunny daysLying on the lawn With the grass tickling our feet
Every time I'm in DublinAnd I smell the hops from the Guinness store houseIt reminds me of my using daysGetting off the bus at Heuston stationWalking by the old hospitalAll the way down the quays Until we reached Thomas StreetWhere we scored And went and cooked it up in the flats 
Every time I eat a sconeIt reminds of when I lived with my ex-boyfriendWhen we didn't have a pennyBecause it all went on drugs And we made crude buns out of flour and water Because we had no other food
Every time I smell chlorineIt reminds me of swimming competitionsOf Lining up to raceAnd the butterflies in my tummy
Every time I see a green jeepIt reminds me of The BoyOf driving aroundDrinking poppy teaAnd drifting in and out of reality
Every time I smell vodkaI'm reminded of the first time I got drunkWhen me and my best friend raided her Mothers drinks cabinetI woke up the next morning in a pool of vomitWe were 14
Everytime I wake up in the middle of the nightIt reminds me of the days When I was sick from drugsWhen my whole body achedAnd sleep was an impossibility
Every time I hear the Friends theme tuneIt reminds me of the late ninetiesWatching my favorite show on a Monday nightThen having to wait a whole week for the next one
Every time I bag up my rubbish binIt reminds me of the times when my boyfriend and I used to bag up heroin to sellThen ended up taking it all ourselves I was always a greedy addict
Every time I hear the Drake song 'Coming home'It reminds me of my last stint in treatmentWhen I heard that songAnd wished I was home
There are things everywhere that remind me of my pastSome welcome Some not so muchIt's amazing the way a smellOr a taste Or a feeling Can bring me right back to a place in timeRight back to a childTo an addictTo a teenagerAll the lives I have livedIt's hard to be remindedBut I welcome itI don't want to forget where I've come fromWhat I've been throughIt's taken every experience I've ever hadTo get me where I am todayI don't resist it I welcome it