You know I wrote a few times about a crush that I had Well it was one of the chefs Who didn't come out with us that night His brother is also a chef And did come out with us At one stage One of the girls pulled me in to the looAnd broke it to me that my crush likes one of the other girls A very young Very tiny 19 year old I have to admit I didn't not see that one comingBut thinking about it now I can see that my crush is more a good friendship more than anything else And maybe that is better I'm not heart broken or anything like it But it seems that the guys I like never like me back Why people?Why?Besides that We had a great night We danced We chatted We sang We took photos One of the girls even took a video of us dancing God forgive me If that ends up in a social media site I will go ape shit
After the pub We walked up to the townBut I swear to God I don't remember a thing from that time until the time I got homeNot An iota Apparently we went to a night clubNo memory of that We went for food No memory of that We walked one of the girls home Then I had to ring my mam for a lift As the taxis don't run at that hour of the morning I. Got home at 6amWhat the hell I was doing until 6am I do not know At one stage during the night The chef asked me if I liked the other chef I have no clue what I said to himBut I'm hoping I didn't say anything about my supposed crushI do however remember telling him about my drug history He was shocked to say the leastBut I get like that when I have a few drinks taken My tongue becomes very loose altogether But hey I harmed so one
Yesterday morning I got up at 11amAnd my God I had the mother of all hangovers I haven't drank like that in yearsLiterally years I surprised I didn't pass out or get sick I got up Had a cuppa I couldn't face food And in fact I still couldn't face it today So I haven't eaten since Thursday Which is not good I know But I will have something this evening I then brought the dogs for a wAlkWhich cleared my head to a certain extent I came home And dozed on the couch Before I headed to work for 4pmSweet Jesus I was dying on my feetAnd in fact I had to work an extra hour So that made the shift even longerI got home last night And went straight to bedWhere I conked out like a light Then I had to be up today To be in work for 8amIt was not easy getting up this morning And I had another long dayUntil 4pmBut in fairness The day went pretty quickly As we were so busy So I didn't have time to mull over things It was great fun today thoughAs we all tried to put the pieces of the night together There were some really funny momenus And the photos that we took are hilarious I really can't share them though As my others co workers are in all of them But I did lost a couple of photos of what I wore at the end of this post
But yesIn all honesty I really should not be drinking Because I'm on a lot of Meds Because I have a history of addictionBecause I know I a disaster area when I'm drunk But As we said today We harmed no one We got drunk Any harm was done to ourselves I won't be drinking like that again It was a once offNot to be repeated When my mam and my auntie came to pick me up They meet some of my work friendsIt was so funny Because we were all so drunk But it was harmless fun Today I feel a bit better I'm more tired than anything I'm in work again tomorrow at 12pmSo at least I have a lie in tomorrow morning Then I have a few days offA chance to catch up on sleep And lick my wounds regarding the chef
Work is finishing up for me in a couple of weeks It's going to be very strange to have no job I'll miss it The structure The routine The money But mostly the friends I have madeThere are some really good and sound people working there Georgina picks her employees wellShe seems to be able to read people quickly and accurately I really have made friends for life I've had jobs in the paSt Where I dreaded going in to work But not this jobThe holiday center is a very special place And both staff and guests are a pleasure to work for I can remember Georgina saying to me at the start of the summer That I would flourish in this job And you know what?She was dead right I have come on leaps and bounds in the last few months My confidence My self esteem My whole demeanour and outlook has chAnged And I Am so grateful to Georgina for giving me a chance Because that's all I neededFor someone to give me a chance And now I know I will be kept in mind if anything else comes up work wise I will keep in touch with Georgina anyway And we'll see what happens
Again Apologies for being a bad blogger For not being as committed as I used to beAnd my reading and commenting has left a lot to be desired But lookI'm not blogging because I'm out there Living my life Working hard laying hard And generally being on the go the whole time But that's goodIt great I now have a life I have a job Friends My horizons are expanding And my issues with food are very much in the background Which is nothing short of amazing Don't get me wrong Things are far from perfect But they are a hell of a lot better than they were I'm trying my best And lookI know I shouldn't have drank last night But I did And I will know for again not to have even one drinkBecause as soon as I get a taste for it I can't stop myself
Anyway I will leave it at that for today I am super tired So just going to flake out on the couch With a cuppa And watch The X FactorWhat did I say earlier about having a life......?
