I’m as picky as they come. First boyfriend was at 19 and lasted almost 3 years. We did the promise ring and cohabitation thing. So I do have some authority on what works and what a lady likes. Also, because you know…I’m a lady. Let me tell you this though, I’m not doing the promise ring thing again. Although the extra diamonds are nice, I’d much prefer the actual “promise” ring (aka, engagement) when the time comes.
More rules on how to please a woman, you say? We already have to make the first move you say? Well, that first move probably took you more than a few drinks and an hour of staring and coming up with a script to say, be honest ;) If not, kudos! You had balls! But even then, it takes a lot of balls to go up to a stranger in hopes of asking him/her out, so kudos to all the men (the women too ofcourse, I couldn’t do it) This is coming from a woman who tried to pick up a bartender with a Carly Rae Jepsen line on a napkin. Yes, this happened. But we don’t speak of this, there were drinks involved…..okay fine, just two. I’m pretty sure I was beat out by a more youthful looking Asian woman who brought in her Game of Thrones book to read at the bar (seriously, who does that?). I recall her saying, “the book is a lot better than the series!” I wanted to say “away with you! I am his Khaleesi!”
But I digress with my failed pick up lines, onto YOUR successes! Now you have that woman, I’m sure you want to make her happy yes?
In no particular order, here are 10 ways to do so:
1. Leave some love notes. This is reverting back to old school ways. Leaving little notes on the washroom mirror, kitchen table, pillow, or even her purse, is a great way to brighten your little lady’s day. Specially if you have conflicting schedules and one leaves before the other one is awake. “Hey honey, just left to grab us some breakfast, be right back! -(your initial)” This guarantees a smile on her face. Unless you did something really douchey the night before, then add a slice of cake to that (well, for me anyways). Or a joke! A joke on a post it note would be a good option too!
2. Send a short, but sweet text. I know at this day and age, people are extremely busy. But take 10 seconds to send your special lady a simple text to let her know you’re thinking about her. It’s not necessary to do this all the time, once in a while is ok. Just as you can’t read our minds, we can’t read yours either. If you’re thinking about us, it’s nice for us to know once in a while. “Miss you” , “you looked so cute sleeping this morning” (even though we know you’re TOTALLY lying, there was probably some drooling and snoring involved), or a “ugh, can’t wait to see you after work” would suffice.
3. It’s not about the money, money, money. We don’t need your money, money, money, as Jesse J would say. Unless you’re involved with a mistress/prostitute/escort and you’re in love with her, then she probably wants your money first. Presenting your lady with lavish and expensive gifts doesn’t replace the thought you could put into something simpler. Take her for a nice moonlit walk and have some romantic Parisian music ready in your iPhone. Just kidding…maybe (no I’m kidding, too cheesy). But moonlit walks under the stars are super romantic, bring a blanket if the weather permits. A little eye contact, followed by a short, but sensual make out session will set the mood. For what? Well, you decide.
4. Remember the little things. They go a long way. Now, I’m not a flowers type of lady, I think they’re overpriced and they die so quickly (not exactly romantic), but if your lady is, go for it. Sunflowers are her favourite? Buy her one or a few on your way home from work and have it set up in a quaint little vase on your kitchen table, ready for her to admire when she gets home. She has her pick of favorite comedians? Surprise her with a comedy flick that features them. She’ll love it, trust me. You might even get a kiss or two from it.
5. Hold her hand. I know that’s common sense. To the long-term couples out there, it comes as instinct, but it’s a great way of connecting. It doesn’t hurt if your hands are the softest thing on Earth. It let’s her know, “I’m with you and I don’t want to let you go.” I know that’s deep, but that’s what I think when I hold my significant others hands. Connecting in the simplest ways can only do good for the relationship.
6. Cook for her. Despite what you may think, you probably look cute doing it. Effort is not foolish, lack thereof is. Just don’t burn the house down or hurt yourself. Bonus if there’s cake for dessert ;). Even if you burn something, you’ll both get a good laugh from it. You can still salvage the rest of the night with some good take-out and a movie. Or just a pint of ice cream to share, that’s good too.
7. Stroke her back. This is great for the ladies who love being touched (not necessarily sexually). While you’re at it, brush her hair back with your fingers. We like it when you play with our hair.
8. Give her a massage. Women are very sensual creatures, we like our skin to be touched. As many know, we like to connect physically and emotionally with our partners, this is one simple way to do so. I know this may sound like a repeat of #7, but who cares, emphasis is important right ;).
9. Make her feel needed, but not to the point where she’s almost your mother. Relationships are all about COMPLEMENTING each other. Make her feel like her presence and absence matters to you. If you don’t make it known, she’ll start having second thoughts about what she means to you. That’s not a nice feeling. As you may all know, women overanalyze everything. Don’t even deny it.
10. Finally, love her. Pass the cheese saws. I know this is SO fluffy, but it’s true. I know not every partnership results in love. If you don’t feel it, you don’t feel it. If so, end it. There’s no use prolonging the relationship hoping you’ll eventually fall in love with them. It doesn’t work that way. And don’t try to pull the, maybe I’ll realize if we’re meant to be together if we spend some time apart. This may work for some people, but not all. It’s not fair to keep the person waiting or wondering, let them move on. Regrettably, romcoms are not real (wait, what?!).
These are not rules, they’re merely recommendations. Also, they’re legal, so why not try them? Just don’t try it on a complete stranger, might be creepy yenno?
To the women out there: What silly or cute thing does your significant other do for you that gives you heart eyes?
