Athletics Magazine

I Should Be a Model

By Brisdon @shutuprun

I love camping because it gives you permission to be the least attractive possible. No make up, no showering. I am hoping I don’t get too many offers to be a model. I get so tired of those.


Sometimes I get these wild hairs where I think we’re not doing enough together as a family or we’re not appreciating where we live enough and I demand we DO SOMETHING. For God sake, everyone get off of your devices and play Scrabble! Get your asses in the car we are going to a campground that is 10,000 feet up and there will be no WiFi, no Netflix and no running water and you will all love it, dammit. And, you will thank me for the hours it took for me to plan meals, air out the tent, pack the car, and put bottles of wine in the cooler.

You will probably get all put out that I might forget one thing like skewers for your marshmallows, but I will remind you I am not perfect and maybe next time you could participate in the packing process.

But, we really did have fun.

The kids learned to play Gin Rummy during a thunderstorm while we were holed up in the tent. We had grilled pork tenderloin and Annie’s mac and cheese for dinner. We took a few hikes and Heidi hated it.


Some of my fondest memories as a kid are camping at Assateague Island in Maryland. We would put chicken necks on string, catch crabs and boil them up for dinner. I always loved the wild ponies that roamed the beach. As an adult I’ve traded the beach for the mountains, but it’s still pretty special.


These three. Could not love them more. I spy some glaciers.


Moving on.

So, I have this little race coming up in a few weeks. It is a 200 mile relay over the Rocky Mountains. I’ve done tons of relays, but never on an ultra team. There will only be 5 of us covering the distance.

200 miles divided by 5 = a shitload of miles per person. Specifically I am doing 39 miles over the 24 hours or however long it takes us. I have 6 runs:

Leg 1: 4.5 miles – This is FUN! And not hard at all! Ultras are so easy!
Leg 2: 2 miles – I could do this in my sleep. 2 miles? Please. I think I’ll jump rope the whole way.
Leg 3: 12.9 miles – Hmmm. Shit’s getting real. Who put this mountain pass here? In the middle of the night? I hate ultras. I am tired. I’m scared. I am too old for this crap. Need coffee.
Leg 4: 5.3 miles – yep, legs don’t want to go. I have to poop. I hate all of my team mates. They smell and are a bunch of complainers. Need coffee.
Leg 5: 7.5 miles. I am running on (fart) fumes. I only have one more leg after this and then I can sleep for 45 hours and binge watch Netflix. Need coffee.
Leg 6: 7.0 miles. This is it! I am doing this. What an incredible experience. I love everyone, especially my team mates. One word: beer.

I usually make up my own training plans, but I was kind of stumped about how to train for this one. I just pretended to put something together that might work. Or, it might not. Whatever.


Hey, one more thing. I just finished Scott Jurek’s Eat and Run. Have you read it? I got some major inspiration and a few new recipes to try.


Do you like to camp? Did you camp as a kid?

What’s the last running book you read? Before Eat and Run it was David Clark’s Out There.


Back to Featured Articles on Logo Paperblog