I don’t think I’m “In Love” with you anymore.
What does this mean?
To me it can mean a few things:
- Whomever is stating this is having an affair
- Whomever is stating this is looking for an easy way out
- Whomever is stating this really doesn’t know what it means to be “In Love”
What does this statement mean to you?
I did a little digging and I’m going to quote my findings:
“‘I love you, but I’m not IN LOVE with you’ is a cop-out. It basically means that I have no clue how to make a relationship last LONG-TERM so I’m exiting to get high from another short-term romance. But whoever they’re IN LOVE with now will also eventually hear, ‘I love you, but I’m not IN LOVE with you.’” (Mort Ferel, in the Christian Post article, “I Love You But I’m Not in Love With You“)
“While someone who says, ‘I love you, but I’m not IN LOVE with you’ seems to be making a distinction between ‘different loves;’ in fact, they are expressing their confusion about what love really is. And that’s why they’re having marital problems and maybe even an affair (because who are they IN LOVE with?).
“Love is something we articulate in the vocabulary of ACTION. Love is a verb. It’s not a feeling you get from another PERSON; it’s an experience you receive as a result of DEEDS YOU DO for another person. And those deeds are not a secret. In other words, love is NOT a mystery! There are specific things you can do with your spouse to solve your problems and build love in your marriage. (Mort Fertel, in the Christian Post article, “I Love You But I’m Not in Love With You“)
“If you hear these words, a big warning bell should go off. This is one of the most consistent things a cheating spouse will say. It is often said by a spouse going through midlife crisis also. Your spouse may have a deep, loving bond with you but, intense feelings of passion can override the bond with you and cause your spouse to lose sight of his/her true feelings. The cheating spouse will develop what I call hormone – induced amnesia. The surging hormones and passion they feel in their new relationship can cause some much-skewed thinking. (About.Com Divorce Support)
So now I’m going to let you in on a secret, well secret for some. My husband recently said these exact words to me.
What do I think?
I have a mix of feelings on this statement. For quite some time I’ve had suspicions. I’ve even jokingly mentioned “his whore” in statements. My marriage life has been complicated for a few years now and I keep plugging away. Trying to find new ways to keep it going, however it takes TWO to make a marriage work.
It finally came to a head the other day and now I’m looking at options. Options of what I can do and what I should do. If this man is not “In Love” with me, then why continue the charade? Life is too short to be miserable. I’ve always said “I’d rather be alone and be happy, than with someone and be miserable.”
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This is the turning point in my blog. As I continue into this new journey, I’d like to share it with ya’ll. I’m sure someone out there can definitely relate and share some good, experienced advice. Thanks, as always, for your continue support. By the way, My Girly Parts has a Secret group on Facebook. The group is totally private and only Approved Members can read it. Feel free to join us there or on our public Facebook Page.
