16.2 million people in the U.S experience severe depression annually. The number is growing. Anxiety and anti depressive medication is being sold at an all time high.
A few things to note for those that may be hurting as they read this.
- You are not alone. You are not worthless. Everyone hurts...some of the time.
- Are you the first person to feel this horrible anguish?
- Are you the only person that feels or has felt this way?
- Is there a chance, however small...that you may look back on this time and smile.
- Is there a chance, however small...that your best days are ahead of you?
- There is a long list of things that can happen from day to day. Always.
- Something constant - is change. Things are always changing whether we think so or not.
You are not depression. You feel depressed or a list of feelings that are bad.
Your feelings come from your thoughts. Test your thoughts with questions
- where will these thoughts lead me?
- will these thoughts get me where I want to go?
- will these thoughts build me up or tear me down?
- where did these thoughts originate?
- are these thoughts based in Truth?
Cheat sheet and summary of the post -
- Ask God for help
- Catch yourself and refuse to dwell and ruminate in unhealthy thoughts
- Get rest and take care of your body
When dealing with such a sensitive topic its necessary for me to get to the point and be straight forward.
Let's approach this in 3 parts. Spiritual, mental, and physical.
God is an ever present help in time of need. God alone has the power to do miracles, bring about full healing, create wholeness, etc.
Also, many times a person suffering (horribly) from mental health issues is actually being harassed and tormented by the powers of darkness. Say what you will, I have seen it and those suffering may attest that this is true.
Even if we are not talking about severe mental anguish. Clinical and borderline clinical depression is characteristic of one who is spiritually unwell. Not always but often.
It's no secret that tarot cards, ouija boards, palm reading, horror scope, little trinkets and statues, pornography, weird meditation, astral projection, drugs, etc.
Can give the enemy licence to bother you and can open your life up to demonic powers.
STEP ONE - Spiritual
Talk to God. Admit to whatever sins may come to mind. Turn from them. You don't have the power to live godly but God gives the power to do so.
This initial coming to God is the highest priority.
To grow spiritually and ask for spiritual help from God is clearly the best first step in becoming free.
STEP TWO - Mental
- SEE IT - Picture yourself in a new tomorrow. I give you the permission to dream again.
Our mind works with pictures. Words create pictures, the subconscious goes to work immediately to complete the picture when one is presented to the mind.
If you have gone through heartbreak, loss, rejection that is psychological trauma. The picture you had has been shattered. Therefore, you may need to create a new picture. Have fun, be free, picture yourself in a new tomorrow.
Feel the wooden desk, the steering wheel, the cool beach breeze, see the office setting of your ideal job. See the dollar amount in your bank account. See you with a new body. See yourself relaxed, content, happy.
Get a passport application, buy a book needed for travel in a different country, buy a dress in a desired size.
Do you see it? What I mentioned above is little tricks to disrupt the negative, dead end story you currently have playing in your mind.
Right now will you say out loud "I'm not going down I'm going up", smile and say "I'm a born winner", "my best days are ahead of me", "this is not the first storm I have been through"
These make a stoic declaration to you, to your mind, to your subconscious mind.
Everything in the room your in...before it was anything it was first a though in someones mind. It's said everything is created twice first mentally then physically.
"I accept that this is the way things are at this moment" first fully accept the facts of your life. Then calmly decide what you wish to do about them.
Absolutely nothing happens in Gods world by accident.
I imagine only 1 or 2 percent of people reading this will do this. But writing something down on paper has tremendous power.
There is something magical about the connection between hand and head.
I recently had a time where I was frustrated with getting a new job. "I don't have this, they won't hire me" "I can't do this particular part of the job" "they will get to this part then decide no" I don't have..." and "but I can't..."
My mind was full of I can'ts and I don'ts. When I began to make a list of what I did currently have and what I could currently do the list was impressive. It was difficult to sink back into a pity party.
Writing what you have, what you are grateful for, what you can offer an employer, what you can offer in a relationship. There are many things you can write down on paper in many different situations that will turn the tide, it can reverse a bad mindset.
What do you fear? What/who are you angry at? If you write a list of it - it will show you what is driving a majority of your behavior and thought life. What I just said is important to note.
Mental Continued
Obsessing over a situation or event past or present will keep you in neutral until you eventually go downward. You will be paralyzed. Regretful of the past and afraid of the future and unhappy with the present.
This is mal-adaptive processing. You broke up two years ago but you still spend many evenings with Ben&Jerry.
The job said no and you are screwed up in every subsequent interview.
You have not accomplished what you wished at your age and are now refusing to put effort toward any new endeavor.
Adaptive processing is where you can TRUTH FRAME
No one can go back and start a whole new beginning but anyone can start today and create a new ending. Will You?
Truth Framing - Looking at a life event or current situation and framing it in reality, in a positive light, in a way that will allow you to overcome.
You can find positive and truthful things about any situation or event. Then make an affirmation "okay, I accept I have missed 2 years of my child's life but this is so that I can be there for the next 20 years" also "had I not missed 2 years I would not be able to be there for 20"
"I have been dumped, there are many reasons why he/she was not the right person and I am now free of what could have turned into a very bad relationship"
"I didn't get that job but this has brought me to a new season and perspective in my life" "I would not have had that new perspective if I had not been rejected"
These are positive truth based affirmations. When you speak something outloud the impact of hearing it is different from just saying it. The impact of writing is is different from saying it.
Are you still with me?
Programming
Read a paragraph of the Bible. Read an uplifting book or story.
Watch an uplifting video. Listen to a truthful uplifting audio book.
Be cognizant of what you put in your mind. Its feeding, it is sewing and reaping. Positive programming will go a long way to taking the edge off of negative thinking.
The mind is like a tape recorder - what you put in will replay.
90% of a persons "self talk" is negative - talk positive to yourself in your mind "I like me"
STEP THREE - Physical
Everyone knows that the first approach to depression is looking at diet, sleep, and exercise.
But who wants to exercise when they feel sad?
Thus, it must be approached with violence and intensity.
If you can force yourself to walk or go to that gym you will without exception feel better afterward.
The mind releases the same chemicals released during drug use or overeating.
SleepOne of the first effects of poor sleep is depression like feelings. Consider Melatonin, chamomile tea, even more expensive products like ZMA or other magnesium, calcium, zinc, vitamin b - blends, geared toward boosting good sleep.
Things like Unisom and common sleep aids are made of the same chemical in Benadryl (diphenhydramine) which can dehydrate and cause poor recovery.
Resentment, unforgiveness, and an unclean conscience have robbed me of many a nights rest. It's nice to review your day before bed.
Sorry to be boring but cellphone and computer light will trigger your mind into thinking its day time - good to avoid.
Fast burning carbs, chips, snacks are my personal favorite when feeling blue. However, they cause roller-coaster and rebounding chemical changes...right?
Have your chocolate but then ease back into more whole foods. A nice big salad, cheeseburger, fish - these will level things out a bit.
In extreme circumstances I have a found fasting helpful. That is, just drinking water for a number of days. Where is a smile emoticon when you need one. Fasting will rob your body of extra energy and quiet everything down. Consult a doctor before fasting. Again, this is a no nonsense post admittedly "outside the box".
Honorable Mentions
People - the surest way of getting out of a funk quickly is by focusing on encouraging or helping someone. Yes, this is the last think you feel like doing. I'm just stating that it works.
We are extremely social interdependent beings. The bonds and connections we experience in basic social settings (not hiding under the sheets) are huge. Might I add there are support groups for many things. Again, the last thing you feel like but perhaps the most important thing to consider.
Past - the past can not be changed therefore it must be accepted
Fear - fear is always based in the future. Therefore, it is not based on fact. Tomorrow this may happen, next week, etc.
Acceptance - acknowledging the facts of your life then deciding what to do about it.
Goals - if you write down goals personal, financial, family, spiritual, physical etc. You will immediately begin to move toward them. But the magic happens when you take the first step toward one...the activity created chases away the blues. And it sends a message to yourself that you refuse to loose.
Focus - don't focus on the big list of problems you have. If you are in a desperate situation mentally focus on small bite size tasks be mindful of preparing a meal, making your bed, etc.
Catch yourself focusing on the past or on problems and what you don't have. The sure way to make a problem worse is to focus on it.
I believe your life will improve. I know its hard to hear but if you put even a tiny part of this post into practice you will see results.
Getting back to where we started. You are not alone. You are not worthless or whatever other lies you have had in your mind. It's surprising how much things change in a day, a week, and a month.