How Not to Change A Bike Tire

I am not sure why this relationship is so strained lately. We used to be so close, things went so smoothly. We made and kept dates. You gave and I took.

But, these days it all feels like an uphill battle. I don’t know if you have changed, or if I am different. I just know that it is not the same. I have big goals for us, so we have got to get it together. Damn you, bike.

The days when we used to spoon.

You may remember last week when I tried to get out the door for a ride, but was stopped in my tracks because I couldn’t find my riding shoes (which my son had hidden).

Today was to be a different story. I quickly and effortlessly made it out the door on this mild and gorgeous Colorado day. My plan was to ride to Rabbit Mountain, about 21 miles round trip. I love this ride because it is sort of challenging, with a steep climb at the end. My friend Michelle even joined me at the last minute. Perfection. (BTW, this is the mighty Michelle who encountered a mountain lion while on a run a couple of years ago. Go read her story HERE if you haven’t already).

I huffed and puffed my way to the top and snapped this picture.

About two minutes after taking that picture and on my way down, my tire blew. When I say “blew” I mean let out all air in a split second, like the biggest bike fart you’ve ever heard. No problem. I had my spare tubes and CO2 (which I had never used before – this is foreshadowing for all of you English buffs).

I am one of those people who assumes things won’t happen, so I don’t bother learning how to deal with them when they do. Flat tire while driving my car? I would be screwed. That is what AAA is for. I know you smart ass cyclists out there can change a flat in 4 minutes (hell, I saw that Youtube video – get a life!). I have not had a flat on my bike for about ten years and I’m not even kidding. It’s a miracle I even had the tubes, etc with me.

With Michelle’s help, I finally got the old tube out and the new tube in (TWSS).

I love this picture because it shows perfect bike safety. It is a very good idea to sit in the middle of the road and change your tire when a car is coming. Idiot move #1.

I got the CO2 canister ready and proceeded to blow up the tire so much it blew, rupturing my eardrum (well, not really, but felt like it). Idiot move #2. I finally got the second tube in and put the CO2 in the canister. Before I could even blow up the tire, the CO2 exploded everywhere and I’m sure it was my fault but I still don’t know what happened. Idiot move #3. I was out of options.

I called my dad for a pussy pick up. I felt twelve years old again. Please come get me, I am stranded. Bring me a vanilla milkshake from McDonalds and a shoulder to cry on.

My dad likes to lounge in the back of his Forester.
I know what you are thinking, apple does not fall far from tree.

That’s my story. We start couple's therapy Tuesday night. Trek needs to shape the hell up.

Ever have a tire blow out? Was it during a race? I have never had a flat during a race. Knock on wood.

What’s a recent mishap you’ve had while working out? I have mishaps all of time and I don’t even do it to have something to write about. Despite what you might think, they aren't all poop mishaps. Last week I was attacked by dogs in Montana. A few weeks before that I feel on the trail banged up my chin.

Who comes to rescue you when your ride/run goes bad? I can usually find someone. Ken, my parents, the barista from Starbucks.

SUAR