Beatrix wrote:
I suppose it depends on what you define as effeminate. If my husband were some knuckle dragging, overbearing, loud mouth, obnoxious jock with questionable hygiene – I doubt I’d be attracted to him either.
Would I date an effeminate man?
Yes.Would I marry an effeminate man?
Yes.Though your husband is probably not effeminate, would you be happy if he changed his behavior tomorrow and started acting effeminate?
If that’s what made him happy too, yes.
I would absolutely not date or marry a man I deemed stupid, nor do I like depressives.
Well that is pretty interesting. Most straight women seriously despise effeminate straight men. I mean hate them with a psychotic homophobic passion you ain’t never seen before. They don’t mind effeminate men as long as they stay on the gay side of the street, but they don’t want them in the straight world.
Not only that, but a lot of straight women have extreme hatred even for not only effeminate straight men but also straight guys who don’t act macho or stereotypically masculine. This means straight men who are not even 1% effeminate, but they are “not macho”: they are soft, soft-spoken, gentle, passive, quiet, sensitive, and often very handsome (but in a pretty way like a pretty boy) straight men. Even non-macho straight guys are constantly being accused of being gay, and I know several who got gay-bashed, one seriously enough to be hospitalized.
All of the guys like this I have known have had difficult lives, dealing with constant and annoying accusations of being gay, but also in fending off interminable attempts by gay men to recruit, convert and fuck, sexually harass or blackmail them.
Not only that, but these guys all have had a lot of problems with women. Some of them have been notorious womanizers, why I am not sure, but they were extremely good-looking. But over and over I have noticed and they have told me about problems with women. Their women often do not think they are real men, ridicule them, put them down, attack their masculinity, laugh in their faces, humiliate them, try to dominate them, and especially cuckold them by having affairs right in front of their faces as a provocation practically daring these men to kill them.
One man got married and had kids, but the last time I talked to him he told me his wife is contemptuous of him, and they never have sex anymore.
Bottom line is their women are upset that they do not act macho or stereotypically masculine and they react in all of these contemptuous ways above.
What is bizarre about this is if you ask most women, they act confused and annoyed that men make such a big deal about masculinity. “Why are you guys so hung up on that?” they ask. They act like they could care less about masculinity. In addition, many women claim they want a non-macho, sensitive, caring, gentle type guy, but they really don’t. They want a meathead caveman. They’re blind and lying to themselves, but women are always blind and practicing self-deception as this is part of female nature.
But I have found out fairly late in life that masculinity is a massive deal for huge numbers of women except they are mostly blind to it and either won’t admit it or are not even aware of it.
I encourage all straight men to act as masculine as they are comfortable with not only to scare off gays and not be accused of being gay but also so they will have more pleasant relationships with women.
If women are going to make such a massive deal out it, we need to realize its importance in our lives and do something about it.
Men really need to start taking masculinity seriously. Either you take it seriously or its going to take you seriously.
