I have had many shopping binges over the years but there’s one that stands out for all the wrong reasons.It was not even a long time ago, and turns out my efforts were ultimately in vain, but hey, at least I learned a truckload of lessons from the experience (though not the type I’d have wanted, but still).So I was supposed to take up a new job at a short notice, which meant working 5 days a week. Having spent a considerable amount of time freelancing till then, I did not have a rich work-related collection in my wardrobe that would do justice to the upscale place I had to work at.So the weekend before the Monday I was to start I set myself the task of getting a new to-die-for work wardrobe. All in a day and a half.Here’s looking at why it was mad and why you shouldn’t ever attempt it.Shopping isn’t always meant to be pleasurable.
When it’s work (like it was for me at the time) it should be approached as such -- in a systematic and professional manner.It will be a huge hassle otherwise which will leave you drained.In my defense though, I did make an effort to be systematic about my shopping. It’s just that I quickly got overwhelmed by the long list of things I had to buy and lost the plot in the first hour itself.
It sucks being a ‘maximizer.’
In his book The paradox of choice: Why more is less, American psychologist Barry Schwartz classifies people and the choices they make along two dominant personality types – the Satisficers and the Maximizers.There are many subtle differences between the two types but for the sake of brevity I will keep it simple. Satisficers are people who set out to shop with a good idea about what they want. And when they find something that roughly matches their criteria or is simply good enough for them, they buy it and walk on. (Note – they do not settle for crap, just know when to move on and they do so quickly.)The Maximizers, on the other hand, never stop looking for that perfect cardigan even when they find something very beautiful early on in their shopping trip. They just have to go through each and every shop on each and every floor in the mall (and sometimes each and every mall in the city, too) just to maximize their chances of finding that “perfect” thing which they can’t even articulate.Anything less than a thorough excursion of all shops in the city makes them feel like they’ve settled for less, which is basically akin to wasting their money and letting oneself down. And hence, they are rarely entirely happy with their purchases even if they are made after elaborate thought and effort, as the possibility of something better being out there is always present.The above description fits me to the T.I had always thought of my maximizing abilities as something to be proud of, a positive. But that weekend drove home the point in a real hard fashion how I was making my life so much more difficult with my idiotic and impractical (and unorganized) searching.Shopping too much in too little time is BAD for your sanity.
Especially when your aim is to actually wear that to work just the day after, and look and feel good in it, too.Elementary, Watson!I wanted to purchase at least 15 tops and shirts, a few pairs of trousers, 4 or 5 all-purpose blazers, at least 6 work skirts, 6 or 7 comfortable but appealing dresses, stocking and leggings to go with them, and a few pairs of work-appropriate high-heel sandals.And, of course, there were the accessories. To complete the look new shades of lipsticks would have to be bought too and maybe a few bags as well, though I already had quite a few in my wardrobe.That was my list, and I did not think it was a lot. It was only meant to tide me over for that month anyway. But boy was I wrong!
When shopping for a specific purpose, dishonesty about what you’re buying costs you even more.I spent first half of the day maximizing my choices but since I was on a deadline (set by my own self), I knew I needed to speed up. But my alternative to not maximizing was simply to lie to myself.You hate the color mustard. You should not even be looking at that hideous top, forget trialing it in a room after having waited for your turn for 15 minutes and then paying $45 for it.And yet you do. What are you telling yourself?Just a glimpse into what was going through my head at the time:Yes, the color is a bit creepy but the fit is alright.They don’t have enough off-beat work clothes here anyway.I might just be able to pull it off with a magenta necklace (please don’t squirm).I might get to like it.Oh hell, who cares, it’s just a top! I’ll wear a nice blazer with it. But do you have the time to make that purchase?No but I can look for it online. Duh.Would you have the time for that given your work hours?I’ll find a way. Now please shut up. If I don’t buy this, what the hell will I wear!Never lose sight of your social commitments when you’re caught in the whirl of shopping.I had canceled all my social obligations for that weekend. That’s right, I did not even bother to see (or call or text) the person I was “seeing” at the time. Nor did I do that the rest of the week or the weekend after that as my binge had left me exhausted and without any time to recover before the work marathon began on Monday.The cumulative effect of it all carried over the entire week and into the next weekend, to rid myself of which I decided to indulge in, guess what, another shopping binge. *epic facepalm*When you have bought something in a hurry you are never happy with it.Sure enough, I deeply envied some of the better dressed women at work, who had in most likelihood built great work wardrobes over time (and the hairstyles to go with them, too). Unlike my attempts to get there in one weekend.I felt weirdly dressed and out of place. It was pure torture, and it only stopped when that assignment got over, a good three months later.All the time I was there I was forced to settle for things that weren’t exactly me, did nothing to flatter my complexion, hair, or even body type. For three months I paraded around like that. In pure misery and removed from myself.
Never again!
*This post was provided by Millie Rainer. She has worked as a content strategist in industries as diverse as hospitality, fashion, and tech. She never skips a chance to share her thoughts on these - you can find her on Google+ if you'd like to say "Hi".
Thank you Millie for such a GREAT post! Until next time........................
