Gaining....

I was in the supermarket the other dayWhen I met a woman that I hadn't seen in a while She reached out to my face And said I looked like I was filling outI waited for the horror of these words to wash over meI bit my lip in case I began to lose my shitI smiled And said thank you I don't know why I thanked herBut I couldn't think of anything else to sayI moved on The smile still plastered on my face And held my breath in anticipation of a complete meltdown But you know what?It never happened The shit storm never happenedI registered the words for what they were Someone wanting to give me a compliment Someone being kindAnd acknowledging that I am getting wellIf someone had said that to me a year agoI would have just lost my shit altogether It wouldn't have just ruined my dayIt would've ruined my whole life But This time This time I was able to take the words in the spirit in which they were intendedAnd that my friends Is progress
I haven't been weighing myself in recent times I've just been going how I feel My clothes still fit I don't feel like they are too small or too big And I've been feeling pretty okBut This morning I had a massive urge to know what I weighed So I pulled my old dusty scales out from under the drawers Stripped And tentatively stepped onThe numbers flashed Then settledBMI : 18I can handle that I can live with that I would be more than happy if my weight stAyed   here Give or take a few pounds How I wish that I didn't give a shitHow I wish that weight and numbers meant nothing to meThat the scales was not the be all and end all How I wish I liked and accepted my bodyMy self Even just part of myself I don't know you guys I hope it gets  better Tell me it doesPromise me....