I think we can all agree that life does not go quite as smooth as we hope or plan. Disappointments come, people can be annoying, relationships end, you don’t get the promotion, and so on. Let’s face it: sometimes bad, annoying, and unfortunate things are going to come your way and when they do you are faced with this:
What will you do? What will your reaction be? Good or not so good?
Jeffrey Rossman, PhD., director of Life Management at Canyon Rance in Lenox, Mass., and author of The Mind-Body Solution, states that when negative situations come our way, we may not be able to change the situation, but we can change our reaction to it. We don’t have to allow it to bring our moods down, but can process the situation and try to see the silver lining. In fact, those that do look for a positive perspective tend to have better health than those who tend to get down and out when struggles come.
If you tend to be more of a downer when it comes to such matters, here are some tips on how you can stay positive when you face these certain scenarios throughout your day.
- Alarm clock does not go off or you just oversleep.
I know you are tempted to rush around like crazy, but it is better to just take a deep breath, gather your senses, and try not to rush to get ready. Rushing will get you in a “rush mode” and you may forget things, be irritable, and not be able to focus all day. Gretchen Rubin, author of The Happiness Project, states that instead of frantically rushing around, remain calm, cool, and collected. Pull open your curtains and greet the day with a smile. If you do so, you will be more apt to have a good day. - Traffic jam just before you get to your job.
It will be tempting to get angry and stew about the traffic situation, or even get anxious about being late, but there are several things you can do to calm yourself down.
First, give your office a call and let them know that you are stuck in traffic and will be there as soon as possible. Second, take a couple deep breaths and smile-even if you don’t feel like it. Studies show that smiling can actually make you feel better, even if you have to force it. Second, turn on a good radio station and relax to some good music. Stressing out about the situation will not do one bit of good, so make the best of it. - You’re handed an unexpected assignment at work that needs to be done by the end of the day.
You finish your last task for the day and smile knowing you only have one hour left at work; then your boss hands you another project that has to be done by the end of the day. Your heart drops and instantly your blood begins to boil. Though it is understandable to be upset, staying upset won’t do you any good. You may even make mistakes on the project that you have to do. It is advised that you take a couple deep breaths to calm yourself down, remember all the times you’ve come through last minute before, and make the opportunity a challenge and not an obstacle. If you have incense or fragrant oils, go ahead and utilize those to create a fabulous odor in your office. Smile, and get busy. - It’s 3 PM and you need a nap badly.
According to Drew Ramsey, MD, assistant clinical professor of psychiatry at Columbia University and author of The Happiness Diet, between 2 and 4pm the brain experiences a slight boost in melatonin, which is a hormone that makes one tired. To combat lethargy late in the afternoon, consider eating a healthy snack or doing some sort of quick exercise to get your serotonin levels up. You could have a cup of green tea with honey in it or take a short brisk walk or both for that matter. Doing so will help you to feel refreshed and ready to tackle the rest of the day. - Your friend calls and says he/she can’t make tonight’s plans.
Feeling disappointment is only natural when you’ve been looking forward to hanging out with your friend, but try not to take it personal or allow negative feelings to consume you. Your friend may simply have a crazy schedule, something unfortunate may have popped up for him or her, or perhaps they are going through a difficult time.
Resist the urge to say angry things or to become resentful. Think of all the things you are freed up to do now that your evening is free. Try to reschedule time with your friend and determine to have a wonderful evening knowing that you can nurture your friendship another time. - You get a text from your partner asking you to pick up his dry cleaning after work.
Life can get busy and you certainly don’t want more added to your plate, but instead of getting angry at the request, know that your partner is just as busy and your thoughtfulness in following through with the request with a positive attitude will help you to feel better in the long run. Keeping score and hurling vicious words at your partner, such as, “What do you do for me?” will only create a negative environment and hurt your relationship.
Take a deep breath, smile, and text back, “I’d love to honey,” knowing that you get to be a blessing to your partner, which will help you to feel better! - You receive an email accidentally from a co-worker filled with complaints about your attitude.
It is understandable if you begin to experience anger right away. No one likes to be talked about, but before you make a hasty decision to confront your co-worker in anger, take a couple deep breaths and try to see the big picture. Your co-worker does not like your attitude, so humble yourself for a moment and gauge your attitude. Has it been good or bad? Do you walk around complaining, gossiping, or blow off your work? Try to see your co-worker’s point of view.
Once you’ve calmed yourself down and evaluated your attitude, you can decide whether or not to confront the co-worker. If you do, handle it in a professional manner and keep calm. It may be an awkward moment for the two of you, but if you can resolve the issue with a heart to heart discussion, your future as co-workers will be much brighter. - Your dog urinated on your new area rug while you were at work.
Resist the urge to “teach the dog a lesson” by spanking it out of anger. Chances are your dog really couldn’t hold his urine any longer. Try to feel compassion for your dog. Take a couple deep breaths and remind yourself that it is not the end of the world. You can clean up the urine and have a good evening.
Think about something you can do immediately to get your mind off of the incident, like going for a walk around the block or flipping through an old photo book. Positive images tend to calm people down very quickly. In fact, research at Chonnam National University in South Korea states that beautiful scenery from landscapes increase “happy” chemicals in the brain, which lead to more positive feelings and a better outlook on life.
Use these tips as situations arise throughout your day to keep peaceful, happy, and healthy. The ability to stay calm and choose a positive perspective in life will keep your attitude pleasant and people will love to be around you.
