Does He Know My Name?

Is there an affliction for the aged? First time I saw such a prayer I hesitated to say amen. I was curious. I asked myself that question. I am tired of all types of affliction. I am in the departure hall of Creation waiting for my flights. That was another friend telling me that when he turned 65 a year ago. We laughed over it. I asked him to explain, he said anytime a human being in the world today arrives at his age, he should mentally take himself to the departure hall of Creation ingratitude. He should prepare for his flight to be called. Hmmm. Can your flight be delayed? Do we have scheduled departures? A friend told me quite firmly that he had every intention of leaving at 60. I remember him saying, he would ask questions if he had to celebrate his 61stbirthday here on terra firma. When I asked him why he said he could not imagine him being70 here on terra firma. He died at 60
Why am I writing in this vein? Wish I can tell you but I have always been known to be reflective as my birthday approaches. I find myself reviewing and checking on what I want. Some of my friends shrug and say, a birthday is not particularly different from the previous day Problem for me is, usually three months before I instinctively become reflective. I reflect on my experiences, lessons learned and sometimes make resolutions. Not, not new year resolutions, I don’t do that, make new year resolutions. Just review us as humanity and the depths we have dropped into.
Should I go to the departure Hall of creation and await my flight? When I hear the comments rest in peace, I am usually uncomfortable. Imagine not being allowed to write for all of eternity. I am horrified by the intensity of that kind of pain. I will be 70 in a matter of weeks. I still love writing.
Standing on the edge of the vast Creation, I watch and sigh, like the elephant watches the ant. It sees the ant bust building its world which can easily be destroyed by the switch of its tusk. Does the elephant know of the ant by name? Crazy thoughts. I sense a vastness I will never fully comprehend, the ego of assuming you are part of Creation, the danger of being swept off if like the ant you become a nuisance. Does the Creator know my name? Is it important? The laws are there to take care of my dreams and longings.
My best friend sighs and tells me that she always knew I have these questions. I am looking forward to completing my 70th year here. It will be significant for me. Some questions will remain unasked as I really do not want some answers? Did my activities in creation encourage love?. Will the mention of my name bring forth a smile, a shrug. Can’t even remember my great grandmother. She earned the right to be referred to as my ancestor. That is funny
These days when I remember my dad,I smile, I can still see his face and my mum, we talk in a more friendly manner now. I am sure some of her pain for loving my dad is lessened. I see her now as a woman and understand the wild love she had for my dad. Have I ever felt that type of love for anyone? I am not in the confessional am I?
I just might be lucky and turn 70. I am grateful for the number of times my love was returned, given and cherished. I feel oceans of love for some too, who might never return it in the same quantum. I have been permitted so much in this creation. Like a pinpoint of light I stand overwhelmed, enmeshed enraptured by grace and mercies. The essence of love and beauty swamps my spirit and I am absorbent grateful spirit.
Thanks for reading, a part of my experience. What is the affliction of old age?
Does the Father Almighty know my name?
Alight pinpoint of gratitude shimmering in eternal praise.?