Counselling Appointment

So I had my first addiction counseling appointment yesterday afternoonI wasn't expecting muchAs I've had many such appointments over the yearsAnd they never amount to muchOther than me sitting through themAnd counting the minutes until the hour is upBut this was someone I've never seen beforeA womanCalled Breda
I arrived for my appointment at 2pmIt was in the same place where I see my doctorWho I ran in to in the hallHe's always very friendlyAnd says a big helloI knocked on Breda's doorAnd she answered straight awayI followed her inAnd sat downI'd been referred from my doctorSo she knew very little about meOther than I was on methadone and other medsI explained a little about my historyWhich is always a painBut it has to be doneI also explained about my recent slipI found her greatReally on the ballShe obviously has a lot of experience
She said that I have come a long wayAnd even though I have slippedI have a lot of work doneShe was very positiveAnd very encouragingShe asked me about my daysI told her that I don't have much structure Other than picking up my medsAnd my dogsShe said it is important that I have a reason to get up in the morningI couldn't agree moreShe also mentioned MaryAnd how she is back in get post as eating disorder specialistShe said she would contact her about seeing me againI am super excited about that!
Breda is also referring me for holistic therapyLike reflexology and reikiAs she thinks it can really helpI was delighted about thisAnd it will only cost me €5 per sessionWhich is amazing!She also gave me a pros and cons list about my addictionEncouraged me to stop thinking about meetings and to just goShe also recommended meditation and mindfulness
I came out of the appointment feeling really good She said that she doesn't new to see me every weekSo I am seeing her again in two weeksIn the mean time I have a lot of work to do 
Breda was greatI had lost faith in addiction counsellors as the last couple I've had were really brutalIt was soul destroying sitting through a whole hour with themSo Breda was a breath of fresh airI feel a bit more clear nowOf what I need to do to get back on trackAnd I feel I can do itIf I can just stay away from Thr BoyWhich is harder than you might think
So today is a new dayA day where I don't use I don't misuse my medsI don't text The BoyOr reply to his textsI walk my dogsI eat as well as I canAnd i do everything I can to help myselfI am blessed to have amazing supportEven Breda said that I am in a very fortunate position I driveI have my own carMy family are nothing but supportiveI have a safe place to liveI want for nothing
This a great chance for me to get back on trackAnd I will grab it with both hands I believe that there is a life for me beyond my addiction and my EDThere is a course I can doA job I can succeed inA boy that is right for meAll this is just there waiting for meI just need to reach out and find itMy destiny is not to be drug addled and destitute Or to die at the hands of my EDI know there is a better life that I'm meant to leadA better road that I am meant to takeI don't know what that is yetBut I am sure that if I stay on trackIt will all become clearI just have to do the next right thingAnd I willOr at least I will try my level bestWhat is the alternative.........?