Cops, Cars and Canines

It all started yesterday morning
I woke with a craving A craving for pasta and crisps and bread and anything else that is beigeAll the things that I don't usually allow myselfI piled my dogs in to my little car and we set off for the supermarketI felt slightly possessed as I droveI had one objective and nothing was going to get in my wayI felt no different than when I used to drive to get drugsThat same fluttery feeling in my tummyThe determination to get what I wantedThe blinkers were on
I rounded a corner and came face to face with a Garda car parked across the roadIn front of the car was a say pointing to the right  saying 'Detour'Feckin' greatThat should have been my first sign that what I was about to do was not a good ideaI pulled in to the narrow road unsure of where I was goingThe road was not so much a road a trackI just kept going praying that I wouldn't meet another carEventually I arrived in my town via a back road
I carried on to the beach where I walked my dogs for about an hourThen it was on to the real businessI took my cloth bag and headed in to the supermarketI filled it with anything that looked goodOr bad ratherI slung my bag over my shoulder Took out my phone to pretend I was talking to someoneAnd walked outAs I left the shop I speed walked to my carI had an awful feelingA feeling that this time I wouldn't be so luckyI started my car and got the hell out of thereLooking in my rear view mirror every few seconds
I really can't you a proper logical explanation for why I do thisI'm not a thief in any other area of my lifeThe only thing I take is foodSo I think this behavior is tied up in my EDI hate doing itI really doBut everytime I say it's the last time, I go back again and againInsanityIt's not really about money eitherAt least I don't think it isI feel huge guilt and shame for doing thisIt makes me feel like a complete loserBut I can't seem to stop
Anyway back to the storyI set off for home and decided to chance the main road and hope the road was openTo my horror half way down the road, I met a fire truck and a Garda carThe Garda motioned for me to stopMy heart thumped in my chestIs this it?Have I been caught?I looked at the bag of food on the passenger seat and cursed silently to myselfThe garda made his way over to my car and I rolled down my windowNow, my dogs are not vicious in the slightest but there is one thing that brings out their protective side and that is when someone comes over to the carI guess they think that it is their car and they have to guard it
As the garda began to speak my two dogs started barking at the top of their lungsThey were throwing themselves at the window barking their heads off and Honey was trying to squeeze between the headrest and the windowTalk about drawing attention to yourself!The garda jumped when he saw them and stepped backI couldn't hear a word he was saying and I was trying to get the dogs to calm down but they were having a fit trying to get at the manI got out of the car in order to hear what he was sayingHe told me to pull my car in to the side of the roadI got back in and pulled in as much as I could with shaking hands and 2 mental dogs in the back'More, pull in more' the garda saidI started to reverse so I could pull in properly when he started shouting at me'What are you doing? I told you to pull in?''I'm trying' I yelledI could see him getting really quite worked up but I was under pressure and I am not the worlds greatest at parking at the best of timesAnd the fact that I had a bag of stolen goods My nerves were shot
I finally got pulled in and I sat and waited for the road to be openedAll the while praying that he wouldn't come back overAfter about 10 minutes the garda waved me onI was so annoyed at him shouting at me that I wanted to shout 'Asshole!' out the window at him but I decided against itI didn't want to draw any more attention to myselfBut  how rude of him to shout at meI mean what was his problem?
I arrived home and felt so relieved to pull in to my drivewayI definitely had a lucky escapeI really need to get my shit togetherBefore I really do get in to troubleI'm out of controlI'm afraidFor the first time in my life I am afraid