....if you could count up how many thoughts you had in a day, i wonder how many it would be?
there are those days where one topic appears to dominate....
and then there are some days when you feel you have a five million thoughts & your brain just will.not.stop.
and there are those days where you go over & over stuff.
repeating a conversation, replaying a scenario, second-guessing decisions made or about to be made.
wondering. pondering. deliberating. regretting. planning. thinking.
questioning. procrastinating. making choices.
when you write a blog, life events can sometimes transform themselves into potential blog posts or at least, blog mentions....blogging is often a good way of working through something.
i am big believer that sharing is always a good thing & i think blogging, even if you only share a little of your life on your blog, does help you (sometimes) to work through a situation step by step....
writing things down & seeing it all there in black & white can often be a really good thing.
my mind seems to have been working overtime recently, i can't switch off!
why is it that at times life seems to be made up of small stuff whereas other times everything is huge, overwhelming & demanding that decisions be made!
choosing bricks/wall colours/a kitchen is one thing....i have no idea what i am doing but i will work it out.
raising a teenager = a whole.other.ball.game.
just as when you become parents & they let you leave hospital with this tiny human being & for a second the thought crosses your mind that you have really no idea what you are doing but they are still letting you take this baby home....
so it goes when suddenly your child becomes into a teenager & yet another transformation takes place, possibly the biggest one yet.
you get through those early years & are almost lulled into a false sense of security, you dare to think that you are doing fine, possibly even really well. you think that you have this parenting job down, you rock!
that's parenting though....
some days you feel you have it all in hand, other days you feel as though you are totally rubbish at it!
then one day you have a teenager.you have managed to get this far in life, you're happy, own your own home, are married, have friends, live in a nice area....boxes have been ticked, life is going along relatively smoothly.
that doesn't of course mean that you know what you're doing, of course not....you appear to have done okay although you by no means have all the answers. many days you feel that you've simply been "lucky".
i guess the challenge & possibly the beauty of life....is that some days you feel as though you know exactly what you're doing, where you're going & what's going to happen next. and some days you really don't.
....and this appears to be where i find myself right now, with my mind full to overflowing.
house plans = not going to plan/taking ages/very stressfulteenager = v challengingsleep = not getting enoughdecisions to be made = too manylife right now = tricky/challenging/full=on/confusing/all of the abovetears = plentyconversations with friends = many, thank goodness ;)
we are two weeks into a new school year & already challenges have arisen....some i can deal with, others have come out of the blue, i find myself not quite sure how to proceed.there's no manual & you just have to hope that any decisions you do make are good ones, the right ones. it's scary, terrifying at times.
often i find distraction in blogging, comfort even....it's part of my daily routine, part of my feeling that everything-is-alright-with-my-world....but some days i've been too distracted to blog, to create, to write.
but, what can you do....apart from get out of bed each day, believe that every day will be a new day & focus on moving forward, coping & doing better.there is no other way, is there...?this post was written as part of the international blogging group "By Invitation", we write once a month & this month the topic is "sharing".
in order to try to gain some of the clarity that appears to be eluding me right now, i thought i would share a little of the jumble that is my mind right now :)
to see more posts on this topic, see Marsha's blog here