Today Ryan Astaphan stops by to share an excerpt from his book, Travelplan.
Excerpt from Travelplan
After a successful day in London, I was brimming with confidence. I had neither a fear nor a care in the world. You could drop me anywhere in the world with my backpack and my weapon of choice – a GoPro HD Hero camera mounted on an adjustable mono-pod – and I’d come out victorious and ready for stardom. Then, India fucking happened.
Shit got real the moment I stepped thru the automatic doors and exited New Delhi’s Indira Gandhi International Airport. Instead of the subway, I opted for a government taxi to take me to the train station. Just at that time it was becoming evident just how clueless I was. When the taxi official asked if I was heading to New Delhi or Old Delhi’s train station, I stared at him blankly. Once that question was sorted out and my fare was purchased, I was jammed into a cab with another passenger, an Indian-looking fellow. Our destination was the same, so we rode together. The tall man had just flown in from his home in Dubai to visit family. Our conversation flowed naturally, as his English was exquisite. To my surprise, both the cabbie and my fellow passenger informed me that it would be highly unlikely to catch a train to Rishikesh that day.
To say dread poured through me might be hyperbole, but serious doubts began to surface. Minutes into India and I had already fucked up. What I needed more than anything at that time was a Guru. Luckily, I was sitting right next to one. The name of my mate sharing the taxi with me? Guru.
Guru ushered me past the throngs of sharks swimming outside the station. Each one eager to pounce and pull me in their direction. I trailed Guru like a duckling following its mother. Something in his heart dedicated his efforts to ensuring my well-being. He inquired and negotiated tickets for me, in fact doing so to the point of missing his intended train. When one option of transportation failed to deliver me to the yoga capital of the world, he moved to the next. That was until an idea sprouted in his head, “want to go to an Indian wedding?” he said. Without hesitation I answered, “sure!”
Once that was decided, we made way for some food and beer. A rickshaw would take us to lunch. As we approached the 3-wheeled vehicle, I passed what I believed to be a leper. He laid on the ground with hands blackened from chalk. Each finger was nubbed, all missing the tips, only revealing a point of bone protruding from each. With his disfigured digits he drew the elephant-headed Indian deity Ganesh on the sidewalk.
Guru and I shared Tandori chicken, naan (a delicious flatbread), and buttered chicken for lunch. The buttered chicken was phenomenal, looking nothing like the name would infer to the Western mind. We washed it all down with large Kingfischer beers. Unlike in the States, 12 oz bottles are not the norm in India. Instead, a bottle around 750 ml is the default size with your purchase.
Lunch was the beginning of my weekend of pampering.
Guru responded to me offering him money for lunch with a gracious “fuck you!” The trend continued over the weekend. Guru and I were in Delhi and needed to catch a 4:20 train to Ludhiana in the state of Punjab, in the northwest of India. We only had one ticket, but he assured me that he could sneak me on. It reminded me of my days of sneaking into the movies. After seeking out the proper gentleman at the station and greasing his palm with a small sum, my spot on the train had been okayed. Some 5 hours later I woke up not more than 80 miles from the border of Pakistan.
Travelplan (2012)
Travelphan is a psychological, intimate, and inspirational story told in a modern voice. Utilizing short chapters, Travelphan is an easy read for the text message and status-update generation. Travelphan is a book like none other.
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About the Author:
I was born in Barnsley, South Yorkshire, England and have always been a bookworm and enjoyed creative writing at school. In 1999 I created the Elencheran Chronicles and have been writing ever since. My first novel, Fezariu's Epiphany, was published in May 2011. When not writing I'm a lover of films, games, books and blogging. I now live in Huddersfield, West Yorkshire, with my wife, Donna, and our six cats - Kain, Razz, Buggles, Charlie, Bilbo and Frodo.
David M. Brown – who has written 837 posts on Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dave.
