Life Coach Magazine

Are You Comfortable Telling Your Mate What You Want?

By Bren @Virtual_Bren

After receiving several interesting comments to my previous post, Why Do We Fake It?, I thought it might be interesting to see how comfortable you are in telling your mate what you want in bed.

Are You Comfortable Telling Your Mate What You Want?

So How Comfortable Are You?

There are many ways to tell you mate what you want in bed. Afterall, you want to be satisfied as well, no? So let’s take a peek at a few tips:

  1. Just say it! I know this may be difficult for some of you to verbalize what makes you feel good so if this is something you cannot do, don’t worry! Check out #2!
  2. Show and Tell! I prefer this method best of all. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with grabbing your mates hand and leading it to where you want it. If his fumbling around your hoo ha, isn’t working, try it together! He/She will definitely understand and appreciate what you are doing.
  3. Roll Play! Ok, I’m not tell you to break out your Princess Leia costume but how about a little episode of General Hospital or the Naughty Teacher?
  4. Signals! If he/see isn’t exactly pleasuring you by military position, have you tried another? What about maneuvering your hips a bit differently. Have you tried a slow gyrations as he’s pumping you? Still not working? How about flip him over and take control! Grab those nipples and ride him like a rodeo rider!
  5. Talk Dirty! I don’t mean be disgusting with your talk but how about verbally telling your mate what you want while you’re in the act? “What me to smack that ass?” “Oh, I see you want to play the bad boy!” Throw out some dirty works like “dick”, “penis”, “pussy(cat)”, and more! How receptive is your partner to that?

Have You Tried Some of These?

I’ll confess, I have. Seriously, I want my orgasm just as much or more as he does! If he’s not cutting it, I’m gonna have to show him! Mind it, I wasn’t always like this but years of being left “short”, made me want mine more! Thankfully, I don’t have the problem anymore but if I did, I’d be right on it by showing, tell, and signals!

What If You’re Not Comfortable Doing Any of the Above?

Have you tried a counselor? How about a sex therapist?  Is there a communication issue between you and your mate?

Don’t knock masturbation — it’s sex with someone I love. ~Woody Allen

Don’t Be Embarrassed

There’s no embarrassment in wanting to be satisfied sexually. We are all adults and have our wants and needs. If you are in a monogamous relationship and you find yourself “faking it”, PLEASE do yourself a favor and try out a few of the tips above. If those don’t help, maybe you should reconsider the relationship. I’m not saying if the sexy isn’t working in the bedroom, you’re doomed, but a healthy sexual relationship between partners is pretty important.

Confession Time

Let’s hear from you. Are you comfortable telling your mate how to satisfy you? Have you tried any of the above? What about tips I didn’t mention? Care to share them with my readers?

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