The past six (6) months I have really taken a good look my relationships of the past, due to my current marital situation. I wanted to see if it was something I was doing wrong or something I was bringing into the relationship to cause dysfunction. After evaluating each and every one, I am happy to say, I’ve accepted them (the past mistakes), have learned from them, and have moved on.
They Were Mistakes
Of course they say our past is what makes us who we are today. However, in the past, I was not only naive, I was just plain stupid and didn’t know what I wanted.
Men came and went. Some lasted longer than others. But ultimately I knew, they would end up mistakes. Almost two (2) marriages and two (2) wedding dresses later, and I finally set my mind on doing what is right for ME, not a Man.
They Were Unhealthy
How do you know if a relationship is Unhealthy? Well in my opinion, if you have to ask that question, chances are you ARE indeed in an Unhealthy relationship.
There was always some kind of baggage! Mind you, I’m not perfect and I do have some PTSD issues stemming from my Mother passing at a young age; growing up in an alcoholic family; and then my brother disappearing as well as my Father passing.
However, I NEVER brought a divorce, a psycho ex, a problem child or children, financial issues, drug/alcohol issues, or unemployed issues into any of my relationships. However, I always seemed to attract those type of men.
You would have thought I would learn my lesson and just either stayed away from men period or been a bit choosier.
Mind you, again, everyone has some kind of baggage; but not everyone makes their baggage YOUR baggage.
They Were Not Good Enough For Me
It took me a long time to finally realize that They Were Not Good Enough For Me.
I don’t mean that to sound egotistical, however, I’ve never brushed my issues off onto another person and I never expected someone to do it to me. But it did happen. Not once. But many times.
I took me a long time to finally realize that they didn’t appreciate me for who I was; it was, what I could do for them.
Again, They Were Not Good Enough For Me.
A Taste of Reality
Everyone brings some kind of baggage into a relationship. None of us are Perfect, however, it takes a strong person to keep their own baggage their own and not push it off onto someone else.
My current marital situation might not be your ideal of a perfect marriage or relationship but for now, it is one that works for me. Does my husband deserve me? At this point, I’m not sure but hopefully in the future, I will be able to answer that question.
What About You?
Have you accepted your past mistakes? Have you learned from them so as not to repeat them? What do you think about the words “It’s Not Ego, I just Love Myself Enough to know I Deserved Better”??
“Image courtesy of Michael Mercol / FreeDigitalPhotos.net”.
“Image courtesy of nuchylee / FreeDigitalPhotos.net”.
