I can't sleep
Partly due to the fact that I have no meds left
But mostly due to the fact that I've been reading about Ian Watkins
And watching documentaries about him
And watching back old videos
Trying to work out where it all went wrong
Did I find an answer?
Did I fuck!
I'm not going to give him anymore time or energy writing about him here so if you want to know who is google him
Just don't say I didn't warn ya......
Anyway
Because I really overloaded on ED posts last week
I thought I would ask you a question about something totally unrelated
Someone asked me recently 'What is the thing that people are most surprised to find out about you?'
That got me thinking
Maybe it's that I can write with both hands (one of many useless talents)
Maybe it's that I have a hammer toe (I know, it's horrible)
But I'd say the thing that people are most surprised to find out about me was that I was addicted to heroin
And I was
For quite a long time
But you already know that
Maybe you'd be surprised to know that I used to work in a bank for part of my addiction and used to go and score drugs in my bank uniform
People used to think I was a cop, he he
Maybe you'd be surprised to know that I used to smuggle drugs in to my incarcerated boyfriend
Or that I overdosed more times than I care to remember
I could go on and on but I won't
I think that people are surprised to learn that I was a heroin addict because I don't fit the stereotype
I came from a good family
From a small town where heroin was virtually unheard of
I looked like a 'good girl'
But none of that matters when heroin gets it's claws in to you
The first time I went to treatment I was 23
The place was (ironically) called High Park
I was there for 5 months
The funny thing is that the only thing worse than a bunch of strung out addicts, is a bunch of clean ones
It was chaos
I found a few photos of me while I was in treatment
I'm on the right in this photoThe girl to my left was a really good friendAfter treatment we rented a flat togetherTotal disasterWe both relapsed
The guy to my right later became my boyfriend
Again an unmitigated disaster
He overdosed in my bedroom
This was my graduation ceremony
The only thing I ever graduated in
What is the one thing that people are most surprised to find out about you?
