Drink Magazine

37 Days Until Alabama Football

By Blake

College football is upon us friends.  It’s officially only 37 more days until Alabama football. Known to every Bama fan as 37 more days until the Tide starts its quest of becoming 2014 national champions.

Here’s just a few reasons why Bama is going to win the National Championship and dominate your team this football season. Sit back, enjoy, and see what’s in store for Bama football this year.

Shaun Alexander

Disclaimer: This post may be offensive if you’re not part of the Bama family or represent a conference other than the SEC.  This article was written in crimson colored glasses and we believe all statements to be true.  We expect you to believe the same after your dreams are crushed when your favorite team plays the Crimson Tide.  If you can’t accept the fact that Alabama will be National Champions at seasons end look away now.   Due to the graphic nature of the soon to be Alabama domination viewer discretion is advised.  You’ve been warned. Roll Tide! 

Nick Saban, the man, the idol, the legend. Not even 100 million dollars could steal him away.  He’s back to win another ship and return the title to it’s rightful owners.

Nick Saban To Texas

Running Back U – TJ Yeldon, Derrick  Henry, Kenyan Drake, Altee Tenpenny, and the list goes on.  Need I say more, our second and third string backs are going to get more yards than your starter.

Alabama Runningbacks

Motivation.  The 2013 season is over and we’re starting this year with a chip on our shoulder.  If there’s one thing you don’t want it’s an even more motivated Alabama team.  Oklahoma enjoy the defeat of a SEC team cause it will never happen again and Auburn come November 29th may Nick Saban have mercy on your soul.

Alabama Football Motivation

Your team is Georgia and you have ol Mark Richt as your coach. Half your team will be gone due to felonies by August which is the norm.  The Georgia Football Team Motto “Where Misdemeanors and Felonies Happen”.

Mark Richt Mad

All your 5 starz belongs to us. Does your weak team from whatever conference even have any 5 stars on it? Pretty much if you see a 5 star recruit you can bet he’s playing for the good guys.

Alabama Football 5 Stars

Lane Kiffin or known to Bama fans as the Lane Train.  You may love him, you may hate him, but you’re probably going to hate him after you see what Bama’s offense does to your excuse of a defense.  Love him or hate him the Lane Train is here to stay.  You can find him on the nearest field torching your defense. Lane Train goes choo choo!

Lane Kiffin Train

LSU your argument is invalid.  Les Miles eats grass and has to replace its starting QB, all its starting wide receivers, its starting running back, and four starters on defense.  Prediction: Corndog sales plummit across Louisana and Saban makes it 4 in a row against the grass muncher.

Les Miles Eats Grass

We live to dominate the B1G 10, Big 12, ACC, Pac 12, or any other conference that doesn’t measure up to the SEC.  Now that the playoff has started we look to continue the trend.  Alabama is 30-4 against non-conference opponents since Saban took over the Bama train in 2007.

College Football Playoff

See we are Alabama and you’re not.  We don’t back down, we just simply win and crush opponents dreams.  It’s in our DNA.  Break it down DJ Khaled.

 

If you think you’re team has a legitimate shot of taking down the Tide this year let me know in the comments below but I can already tell you the answer to that.  To all my Bama fans Roll Tide and to the haters, may Nick Saban have mercy on you.

“If wanting to win is a fault, as some of my critics seem to insist, then I plead guilty. I like to win. I know no other way. It’s in my blood.” – Paul “Bear” Bryant

 


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