A couple of weeks ago, I put a post-it-note on my mirror in the bathroom that says; "I love you unconditionally right now, you are beautiful inside and out." I look at it, and then I look into my eyes and repeat the words while I brush my teeth for 2 minutes, twice a day. Seem strange? Why? Why are we so hesitant to tell ourselves positive things? How many thoughts go through your head every day that are critical, shaming, shoulding, etc.? Are you even aware of them? Words are very very powerful, and I for one, am tired of the same ones taking up rent-free space in my mind. It's time I change the dialog. I wasn't born thinking I wasn't good enough. I was taught that. I was taught that by people who didn't love me the way I deserved to be loved, by people who loved me, but didn't think they were good enough - and they passed that belief to me. We are all, especially as women, taught that we aren't good enough if we don't look a certain way, or wear certain clothes, or weigh the "correct" number on the BMI chart... Speaking of weighing, when will we all realize that the scale does not equal self worth. It doesn't even measure health! It is one measure, not THE measure... For years, and often still, I fight the desire to determine how I will feel about my day, my body, or my success based on the number of pounds I weigh. I learned at the age of 9 that pride around this number was not determined by self - but by others' standards. I had started Weight Watchers(yep at age 9) and I was sooooo proud that I lost weight and weighed 95 pounds, at well over 5 feet tall. I brought my certificate to Show and Tell, and was mocked immediately, and for the rest of the school year for being fat. You see, those kids had already been taught that worth was a certain number, and I did not fit into the range. How do we learn that so young? Weighing in gym class anyone? How about weighing in the doctor's office? I work with women all of the time who come to me saying that they want to change how they eat so they can get more energy. After a couple of weeks, when I ask how things are going - their response is, I feel good - but I haven't seen anything happen on the scale. Wait a minute... you are seeing more energy - which is what you wanted, but yet you are not a success because you are not losing weight?! Often these women are already within the healthy BMI range, but they have a certain number in their head that they are convinced will lead them to feeling better about their lives. I can promise you; that number will never, ever be enough to make you happy. I've been there! I lost 200 lbs, and instead of being satisfied - and self-confident, I still picked apart the areas of my body that weren't good enough. I still wanted to lose another 15lbs. I still compared myself to every woman, and was convinced she was better than me, just because of how she looked. And sadly, I am not nearly as obsessed as many women I've come across. It's time to start changing this conversation!!! We cannot wait for men to change it, or for the medical industry to change it, we - each and every one of us, needs to start changing it for ourselves first. We must strive to define our health, and our lives based on every thing that cannot be measured on a scale.
I took a picture while driving home from doggy daycare yesterday - this is where Mr. Ball's paw was the whole ride home. Talk about a backseat driver...
In the (Vita)mix this morning: -2 cups spinach, -1banana - 1 mango - 1 scoop protein powder - 1 cup almond milk. mmmmmmmmmmmmm
If nobody has told you lately, you are beautiful. You are beautiful right now, with every flaw and imperfection - you are lovable. You deserve to live your life feeling proud, deserving, and capable of achieving anything you want to. Start defining health in your own way, isn't it time? If you don't, who will? And if we continue to allow others to define it, and make us feel as if we don't measure up, then we are leaving the world the same - and the next generation is facing the same bullshit our grandmothers, our mothers, and we, ourselves had to face at the age of 13, 16, 26, 36, ... You have the power to change the conversation.