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Whole Foods Press Release: “we Love You.”

By Nottheworstnews @NotTheWorstNews

Whole Foods Market issued a press release in which its Executive Vice-President of Operations, David Lannon said:

“We are looking forward to deepening our connections with customers and saying ‘thank you’ and ‘we love you’ during this special Love Fest season…”

3 Questions That Arise From This Story

  1. “Are you really looking forward to telling customers you love them, David Lannon?  Let us know how telling that to random strangers in a grocery aisle works out.”
  2. “How much does it suck having to be quoted in a corporate press release? We don’t know, but we look forward to some copywriter putting ridiculous words and delicious Whole Foods organic products in our mouths.”
  3. “Do you love your customers because they still shop at your stores despite one selling ‘asparagus stalks in a jar of water’ and others selling ‘items with labels inflating the quantities of the contents?’  That definitely sounds like true love and not pretend-love-based-on-money.”

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