When I was pregnant, almost everyone’s advice to me was to “enjoy every moment because it goes fast”. Honestly, I didn’t believe them. I did enjoy being pregnant for the most part up until the end when I was more than ready to “have this baby”. I was sore, uncomfortable, tired and time was moving in slow motion.
My water broke unexpectedly which caught me by surprise and caused a lot of initial excitement but life still continued to move slowly. I didn’t have my baby until 40 hours after I sprung that surprise leak. My baby finally entered this world and he was placed on my chest and I got that “hallelujah moment” when I first held him. Then after the angels had finished their welcome to the world song, someone picked up a remote control and pressed fast forward.
Life seems to be moving at a tremendous speed for me and I keep thinking that I have to write more things down because I’m afraid I’m not going to remember all the precious moments I have with my son everyday. Journaling can be one of those things that gets pushed to the bottom of my “to do” list and it’s too bad because unlike scrubbing the toilet, I really enjoy doing it.
I love writing and taking pictures but sometimes I don’t because I just want to fully experience living in the moment. The other day my husband and son walked (toddled) hand in hand across the street to the park for the first time. I couldn’t believe how big and how little my son looked all at the same time. I went to grab the camera but stopped myself because I knew the moment would be over by the time I found it.
To my son: I’m sorry I have not been great at recording every single thing down that you have ever done in your 16 months of life. I’m sorry about the unfinished pregnancy/baby book and first year calendar that both have sporadic entries with random pictures in all the wrong places. I don’t think written words could ever completely capture how my heart feels when you say “da de doe” (there you go) or the way you make an “ahhhhh” sound after you see Daddy take a sip of coffee. Maybe I won’t be able to recall every single detail of your life in 30 years, but whatever doesn’t get written down will be permanently imprinted upon my heart. I was too busy to write because I was busy loving every single minute with you.
About the Author
Image courtesy of hin255 / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
When I was Pregnant
