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Venture Capital Firm Invests $15 Million In Web Site That Explains Rap Lyrics

By Nottheworstnews @NotTheWorstNews

In case you were wondering whether there was money floating around the U.S. economy or not, CNBC reports that a venture capital firm just invested $15 Million dollars in a web site called Rap Genius, that explains rap lyrics to parents who just don’t understand and other Squares.

From the article:

“As an example, Horowitz cited a Lil Wayne lyric, ‘real G’s move in silence like lasagna.’ Click on it, and Rap Genius explains the singer is referring to gangsters and the silent g in lasagna.”

The site uses crowd sourcing, and the crowd being referred to is apparently anyone as the site has a link: “Couldn’t find the song you wanted? Add it yourself.

To paraphrase: if you didn’t understand a song, put in your own explanation, Person- Who-Does-Not-Get-The-Song!

Did we mention CNBC reports the company’s business model is “TBD,” which for those who did not know what that means, CNBC translates as meaning “to be determined.” And while we eagerly await the unfolding of a business model, since anyone can interpret lyrics on the site, here are:

3 Worse Explanations Of Lil Wayne’s Lyric “Real G’s Move In Silence Like Lasagna”

1. This is a secret song paying homage to Garfield, whose name starts with G, and who frequently moves in silence with bubbles above his head, revealing his thoughts. And as any Garfield fan knows, he’s secretly thinking about how much he likes LASAGNA!

2. Lasagna is the silent killer moving through the arteries of those who over-indulge in this food product containing high cholesterol meats and cheeses.

3. Lil Wayne has not cleaned out his fridge in six years and that’s why his leftover lasagna has grown legs and is on the move! How do we know the lasagna is moving? Because Lil Wayne didn’t just choose any old noun with a silent “G” in it like “Knight”. And anyone who has ever played chess knows that a knight moves in an L pattern. So obviously, Lil Wayne wanted to describe a noun with a silent “G” that moves differently than the hardest-to-explain chess piece! After all, when he wrote the song, there was nobody investing millions in a web site that would explain rap lyrics about chess pieces!

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