Gary

LATEST ARTICLES ( 248 )

• Tommy Lasorda Poetry

  

  I have never, ever,since I managed,evertold a pitcher to throw at anybody,nor will I ever. And if I ever did,I certainly wouldn'tmake him throwat afucking .130... Read more

  Posted on 14 September 2024 BASEBALL, SPORTS

• Summer Movies

  

  The girl was talking in a frenzied and animated manner about her father's fashion sense. "Don't ever wear socks with sandals, nothing dries up a vagina... Read more

  Posted on 30 June 2024 BASEBALL, SPORTS

• Listening to Baseball on the Porch

  

  "The truth of a life is the fiction that sustains it."-Violaine Huisman So I'm sitting on my porch soaking up the lazy, hazy summer sun, inhaling my neighbors... Read more

  Posted on 24 June 2024 BASEBALL, SPORTS

• Baseball Cards and Scraps of Thought

  

  "The world is billions of times more complicated than any of us understand, and because we are desperate to understand the world, we buy into these... Read more

  Posted on 10 June 2024 BASEBALL, SPORTS

• A Haphazardly Written Essay at 4 AM

  

  I've read somewhere that the witching hour is a time for spirits to cause trouble and perhaps even Beezlebub himself makes a celebutante appearance, prancing... Read more

  Posted on 23 May 2024 BASEBALL, SPORTS

• The Curious Case of Darrel Boyd

  

  I'm lazing in the broiling sun, drinking a beer and watching players warm-up when the jerry rigged speakers crackle to life. "Will the person who owns the... Read more

  Posted on 01 April 2024 BASEBALL, SPORTS

• Kong And Heartbreak

  

  Recently, I visited a friend in Los Angeles, and in a drunken haze (and remorseful weakness) I decided to buy a pack of cigarettes. It was an odd and not... Read more

  Posted on 19 February 2024 BASEBALL, SPORTS

• The John Fisher “Clown Show” Continues

  

  Like every MLB team, the A's will hold a Fan Fest this winter. Except the A's Fan Fest will be provided by the fans, (ahem...for the second year in a row)... Read more

  Posted on 04 January 2024 BASEBALL, SPORTS

• Just Get the F*ck Out. You’re Dead to Me.

  

  Did you ever have a girlfriend break up with you but then have the audacity to ask to continue living in your mutual home for a period of time while her new... Read more

  Posted on 17 November 2023 BASEBALL, SPORTS

• October Baseball and Other Ramblings

  

  "They used to call it a Texas-Leaguer...then it was called a blooper...now it is called a flare." -Vin Scully I had COVID a few weeks back and the effects... Read more

  Posted on 26 October 2023 BASEBALL, SPORTS

• Sandlot Baseball, BBQ and Hangovers

  

  "Baseball must be a great game because the owners haven't been able to kill it." -Bill Veeck My hangover was so bad that it seemed to have its own scent and eve... Read more

  Posted on 25 September 2023 BASEBALL, SPORTS

• Dream a Little Dream

  

  "And it is only after seeing man as his unconscious, revealed by his dreams, presents him to us that we shall understand him fully."-Sigmund Freud She said, "I'... Read more

  Posted on 08 August 2023 BASEBALL, SPORTS

• Backyards to Ballparks

  

  A few months back I mentioned that I was going to be published in a book called Backyards to Ballparks. I decided to re-print the essay. If you're interested... Read more

  Posted on 11 July 2023 BASEBALL, SPORTS

• Pathetics Swept In Beantown

  

  Thank goodness the All-Star break is finally here...meaning the John Fisher Deep Dive Into Hell is halfway over. The abomination known as the Las Vegas A's... Read more

  Posted on 10 July 2023 BASEBALL, SPORTS

• The Rich Get Richer and the Peasants Suffer. Sayonara, A’s.

  

  I didn't really know what to say or how to address the A's moving to Las Vegas, so I just decided to cut and paste an answer sent to Dan P. over at Chipilatta, ... Read more

  Posted on 15 June 2023 BASEBALL, SPORTS

• Baseball Is Kind of Awesome

  

  I'd like to give a cheerful and warm thanks to Mark over atRetro Simba for sending me some various Oakland A's baseball cards in the mail, although one piece... Read more

  Posted on 06 June 2023 BASEBALL, SPORTS

• Baseball Cards With Curious Stories to Tell

  

  My girlfriend told me that a man had tried to hang himself in the tree out in front of her house with his tie. Apparently, he had decided that his life was to b... Read more

  Posted on 30 May 2023 BASEBALL, SPORTS

• More Baseball Stuff That Makes Me Lose My Goddamn Mind

  

  "I opened my eyes and saw the real world, and I began to laugh and I haven't stopped since." - Kierkegaard Statistical guru Bill James recently laid bare that... Read more

  Posted on 04 May 2023 BASEBALL, SPORTS

• Mutts Sweep the Pathetics

  

  I spent most of my weekend in a hoppy, sudsy, comatose state on the couch watching the Mutts of Queens take out their brooms and sweep away the proverbial trash... Read more

  Posted on 17 April 2023 BASEBALL, SPORTS

• Let’s Face It, the Oakland A’s Are a Grift

  

  How it looks: the Oakland A's are a pathetic franchise that plays in an archaic, crumbling, feces-strewn, possum-infested stadium, only draw about 3,000 fans pe... Read more

  Posted on 25 March 2023 BASEBALL, SPORTS