Christopher De Voss

LATEST ARTICLES ( 575 )

• The Future of Movies Has A Name: Kung Fury

  

  Kung Fury hit Kickstarter back on December of 2013. This date will be as important to remember as all other important dates that we are made to remember…such... Read more

  Posted on 05 June 2015 HUMOR

• Father’s Day Gift Ideas You Can Swear By. And So Will Dad

  

  Just like Kanye West’s next public outburst, Father’s Day will be here before we know it. That means Dad will once again be wearing new underwear and smelling... Read more

  Posted on 02 June 2015 HUMOR

• This Week On Earth: May 24th – May 30th 2015

  

  Hello Saturday!Let’s take a look back at what was notable in news, internet, and other shenanigans for the week of:May 24th – May 30th 2015 Charlie Charlie Can... Read more

  Posted on 30 May 2015 HUMOR

• Graduates: Don’t Look Back… Because Your Old Room is Already a Hot Tub

  

  To this year’s high school graduates:As you cross the stage to receive your diploma, remember that you’re crossing a brand new threshold in your young life. Read more

  Posted on 29 May 2015 HUMOR

• 2015 Advice To Graduates

  

  Howard the manager got a request for a graduation speaker.  I was not his first choice to fill the ticket.  Actually I think he tried to get a guest blogger whe... Read more

  Posted on 27 May 2015 HUMOR

• This Week On Earth: May 17th – May 23rd 2015

  

  Hello Saturday!Let’s take a look back at what was notable in news, internet, and other shenanigans for the week of:May 17th – May 23rd 2015 This Is One Way To... Read more

  Posted on 23 May 2015 HUMOR

• Read This Before You Lick Your Keyboard

  

  Fun quiz here, people: one of the most germ-ridden areas of your house is: The toilet Your butthole The TV remote Your keyboard You backspace A LOT If you... Read more

  Posted on 18 May 2015 HUMOR

• This Week On Earth: May 10th – May 16th 2015

  

  Hello Saturday!Let’s take a look back at what was notable in news, internet, and other shenanigans for the week of:May 10th – May 16th 2015 Puff, Puff…Can’t... Read more

  Posted on 16 May 2015 HUMOR

• History of The World: May 3rd – May 9th 2015

  

  Hello Saturday!Let’s take a look back at what was notable in news, internet, and other shenanigans for the week of: May 3rd – May 9th 2015 This Is What Happens... Read more

  Posted on 09 May 2015 HUMOR

• Part Two: LAP Interviews Self-proclaimed Best-selling Author Ima Knowitall

  

  Ned with an advanced copy of “50 Shades of Time-Traveling Vampire Love.”As I mentioned in Part I of my Long Awkward Pause interview wth Ima Knowitall, she is th... Read more

  Posted on 07 May 2015 HUMOR

• LAP Interviews Self-proclaimed Best-selling Author Ima Knowitall

  

  With the release of her highly anticipated online novel Time-Traveling Vampires of Love just a few days away, I held little hope of getting an interview with Im... Read more

  Posted on 05 May 2015 HUMOR

• History of The World: April 26th – May 2nd 2015

  

  Hello Saturday!Let’s take a look back at what was notable in news, internet, and other shenanigans for the week of:April 26th – May 2nd 2015Burning Down The... Read more

  Posted on 02 May 2015 HUMOR

• Alcoholic Abominations

  

  In mid-March I had an experience with alcohol that was so incredibly awful it bordered on laughable.  The best way I can describe it is that it was “an alcoholi... Read more

  Posted on 01 May 2015 HUMOR

• Win One Zero One The Card Game!

  

  Now that Long Awkward Pause has hit the big time…and by big time we mean ALL of our Moms now read it…we have stock piled a mass of things to give away.(Big... Read more

  Posted on 29 April 2015 HUMOR

• McDonald’s Welcomes Joseph Stalin To Its Management Team

  

  The following internal McDonald’s memo has been leaked to a LAP reporter.Credit: http://www.nationaljournal.comDear valued McDonald’s employees! Read more

  Posted on 27 April 2015 HUMOR

• The End of the World Tastes Like Mac ‘n’ Cheese

  

  Because all of the Long Awkward Pause readers are smart, savvy and don’t live under rocks (except for a guy named Hogan from Idaho), you by now know that the... Read more

  Posted on 23 April 2015 HUMOR

• LAP Covers the Election

  

  After I recovered from my St. Patrick’s day research, Howard the Manager waddled over to my desk and dropped a manila folder on my desk.  It had jelly donut spo... Read more

  Posted on 14 April 2015 HUMOR

• Die Cellulite, Die

  

  Cellulite, wherefore art thou? And by “wherefore” I definitely mean “why,” not the commonly mistaken “where,” especially because no one has trouble locating thi... Read more

  Posted on 09 April 2015 HUMOR

• Other Things Maya Angelou Didn’t Say, On A Stamp

  

  Last year, noted author and poet Maya Angelou passed away. The United States Postal Service responded in the only way it could, by designing a stamp in tribute... Read more

  Posted on 08 April 2015 HUMOR

• Spider-man Saves Easter!

  

  Back in the 1970’s there was a weird phenomenon where the entertainment industry (in collusion with Hallmark) decided in order to take our minds off the Cold Wa... Read more

  Posted on 04 April 2015 HUMOR