Destinations Magazine

The Shape of a Warrior

By Sweetapple19 @sweetappleyard

Mum and I were talking about boys and careers and business start-ups the other day. And in a moment of motherly worry and care, Mum says to me… just be careful. You always go at things full speed and I don’t want to see you get disappointed.
I took on board what she said and I rolled it around inside the stillness of my mind. Back and forth, back and forth like a precious trinket. And I felt that little pang inside my stomach when you doubt yourself, just for a second.
And then I turned to her, thanked her for the concern and explained the following...
Mum, you raised me to be that girl. I am that girl who hits life at full speed. Love, careers, creative endeavours…remember the obsession with vintage teacups? Everything I do is at pace and led by my heart, and quite often, my head is left right out of it.
I am that girl who approaches each new chapter with my foot flat. And sometimes I fail. Sometimes I hit fifth gear and I go hurtling into the wall and everything smashes apart. And I lay amongst the broken pieces, rubbing my head and wondering what the hell happened. However, you also raised me to be the girl, who gets back up and does it all over again, but better. The girl who never lets one smash keep her from the glittered path.
You raised me to be this girl, who faces everything head-on. And fails and wins and laughs loudly and cries softly, and has adventures and no matter what happens, will write an interesting memoir one day, about becoming.
So, I will continue to go at love and my career and my business dreams at my usual pace. And I won’t be cautious and I won’t play it safe, even though I know it may go horribly pear shaped. And it definitely may go horribly pear shaped. But what if it takes on a different shape. A shape of passion and creativity and togetherness and love and blinding ambition. A shape full of curves and turns and ups and downs. A shape that makes me thank god that I didn’t play it safe. I want to be the shape of a warrior. Whatever dented shape that may be. 
Much love XX

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