Today as I was out doing my normal Saturday routine, which is basically walking around Target, I stumbled upon the report that Heidi Klum and Seal were divorcing after almost 7 years.I immediately thought of the seven year itch and the number seven. When I was younger, I often heard older people talk about the seven year itch and how at that seven year mark it basically became the make it or break it period in a relationship or marriage. For those of you who have never heard the term before, the seven year itch is basically when all hell breaks loose. One or both of you begin to think the grass may be greener on the other side, you out grow each other, you realize you’re going in separate directions, the sparks are gone, and last but not least it leads to cheating. The number was given meaning because apparently after seven years the itch of sexual desire takes over a man and he strays, but as we very well know, women get itches that need to be scrathed as well. This number comes from the statistic that once stated that the average marriage lasted for seven years. In recent studies it now shows that the average marriage now last two years…smh. I know this can be somewhat frightening, especially if you’re single and want to get married again but I’m a firm believer that marriage and relationships take work and as with anything else not every day will be peaches and cream or a walk in the park. Life is not designed to give you perfect bright sunny days for everyday of your life. If every day was perfect, people wouldn’t know the true meaning of words like appreciation and gratefulness. Which is why some people never appreciate what they have until it’s gone! I honestly think that today some people get married with the mindset that if things don’t work out we can just end it and life will go on. Well guess what? If you get married with the mindset that things won’t work out…..it probably won’t!
As I’ve stated before, somehow I do my best thinking at night. My sister once told me that it was something about me and the number seven, so as I was thinking tonight I realized that she is exactly right. First, I was born on the 16th day of June; the date of my birth equals 7. I met my ex-hubby on 2/14 which equals 7 we officially became a couple in March and married 7 months later, our marriage lasted for 7 years, we separated in July the 7th month of the year, we tried to works things out and officially ended things on 12/31 which if you haven’t figured it out equals 7, we divorced the following year in July the 7th month of the year of 2007. Last year I met someone; we spoke for the first time 2/14 and guess what it lasted 7 months. When I think back on my pass dating experiences most of them fizzled out at the 7 month period. That’s normally the time frame when I say ok this is not working or something’s not right. I honestly can’t think of a time when someone has ended things with me. When I start to feel that something’s not right I don’t ignore my instincts because they are too distinct, I have a clear vision of what lies ahead and I live by the motto “I’ll get you before you get me”. This technique hasn’t spared me heartache but it sure as hell made me feel better knowing that I wasn’t continuously lied to, cheated on, taken advantage of, or sitting around waiting to exhale. I’m now thinking that if I can last pass 7 years and 7 months with someone then maybe I can exhale So how can you make it pass the seven year itch? Commitment, that’s your answer, a commitment to yourself, a commitment to your partner, a commitment to the love you have for each other, and a commitment to fixing things, if that’s what you BOTH desire.