The Dumb Things Authors Have to Worry About & Another Fun Poll!
I started my Kilty series because I tried to watch Outlander (which isn’t my thing but my mother was insistent) and all I could think the whole time was..
- This guy is hot but you know he smells like B.O. There’s no deodorant unless she thought to grab a hundred packages of it before she was whisked away.
- If they keep having sex like this she is definitely going to get a urinary tract infection and antibiotics haven’t been invented yet
- I doubt she smells like Chanel no. 5 either.
- They just had sex for the first time and she’s just lounging around in the bed like pregnancy isn’t even a thing and maybe that’s something she might want to consider with everything going on at the moment.
All of which cracked me up and horrified my mother (which cracked me up even more).
So I wrote Kilty as Charged, where my sexy Highlander, Brochan, comes to OUR time and is obsessed with showers and hair products so I could clean up my very manly, stinky Scotsman and save my heroine (Catriona) from urinary tract infections.
But that doesn’t solve all my problems. For instance, he’s clearly not circumcised. This isn’t an issue for much of the planet but it’s often gotten a shiver from girls in the United States. But millions of US women don’t think about that when they’re lusting for Outlander’s Jamie. Clearly, women can just push “facts” into the back of their head for the sake of romance…
…but then I get this urge to address these things…in a funny, non-gross way.
I think you’re starting to realize why I don’t write flat out romances. The Kilty series is a romantic suspense (heavy on the suspense, thrills and humor) with a nice dash of romance and sexual tension. Nothing too foofy and no detailed descriptions of sexy time. It’s the best I can do, ladies.
Anyhoo, last night I wrote a funny scene where my heroine’s friend, Peter, is at a urinal with Brochan, my Highlander, and he’s a bit intimidated by the strapping Scotsman’s bait and tackle. To mess with Brochan, Pete (who has a bit of a crush on Catriona) tells Brochan that the big man’s nether regions will terrify Catriona to try and scare him into not pursuing her.
The whole thing had be cracking up…but it makes me worry I’m penetrating the veil of plausible deniability romance readers sometimes like to drape over their heads when they’re dealing with unhygienic time periods and pesky real life and whatnot.
So I have another poll for you!
Does it bother you to have a little REAL in your Romance?
- I prefer to pretend everyone smells like roses thank you very much.
- I always like things to be REAL!
- Normally like the fantasy, but since this series is funny, I think it's fine to have real life create funny situations.
- I'm way on your cozy mystery side and I'm going to pretend you didn't just talk about nether regions at all.
View Results
Speaking of Romance, here’s a sexy giveaway!
Book Steals and Deals
Start Date: 05-23-2018End Date: 06-24-2018
From Garden To Grave
By Rickie Blair
Usual Price: 2.99 Sale: FREEVerity Hawkes, accidental gardener, blunders into a murder mystery in the deceptively idyllic village of Leafy Hollow while hunting for her missing aunt. From Garden to Grave is the first book in a series of delightfully funny cozy mysteries.
Amazon |Kobo Link|BN |Google|Apple iBooks
Start Date: 04-29-2018End Date: 06-30-2018
Betrayal: A Tall Pines Mystery (Tall Pines Mysteries Book 4)
By Aaron Paul Lazar
Usual Price: 3.99 Sale: .99Marcella’s marriage is in trouble. She flees to the snowy woods and bumps into a former lover, Sky, who reveals that a serial killer is stalking local young women. When the eighth teen girl disappears, Marcella and Sky wind up in the killer’s sights.
Start Date: 05-28-2018End Date: 06-30-2018
Pushing Up Daisies (Tea Shop Cozy Mystery Book 1)
By Katherine Hayton
Usual Price: New Release Sale: .99Fifty-something widow Willow Foxglove was looking forward to a cup of tea and a dalliance with the local realtor. Instead, she ended up with a dead body on her doorstep!
Amazon
Start Date: 05-12-2018End Date: 06-30-2018
Sweet Water
By Laurie Lewis
Usual Price: 2.99 Sale: .99Blindsided by a friend, hudson’s and Olivia’s moment was lost, until tragedy brings them face to face.
As enemies.
Is it possible to ever love an enemy you once called friend?
Amazon |Kobo Link|BN|Apple iBooks
