I had three friends – very close friends suffer divorce this past year. It was not easy to see them grieve the loss. The loss of a loved one, the loss of a family unit, the children, lose the sense of security. It was actually quite saddening. I am not sure what to say about divorce, but I do know the pain of it. When meaningful relationships were purposed to be together for a lifetime, according to the Bible, the marriage decree is extremely devastating when a couple is harmed by divorce. I believe the reason this is true, is because divorce harms the spirit of a man and woman.
I am a divorcee. (Ouch). It sounds funny for me to even admit it. I never identified with this term before but I suppose it’s what people are called when they divorce. I would never place the harm of being divorced soley upon one person. As I look back and determine what broke up my first marriage, I realize I may not have been very mature in my marriage, but that may be because I made choice to marry to very early. Before my soul was mature (my mind, will and emotions).Though it caused a lot of pain for us both, I truly believed I was in love when I did it. Anyone can look back and have regrets perhaps, but I believe the real pain of divorce is in the breaking of the covenant before God. Since God created marriage, it would only make sense that you feel the deep pain of a covenant broken, spiritually between a man, woman and God. It’s supposed to be one of the strongest bonds there is. God doesnt take the breaking of covenant lightly, so I believe that’s why it’s felt so strongly. Yet, there is life after divorce.
Malachi 2:10,11, 13-16 describes why marriage is so special to God.
“Have we not all one Father?
Has not one God created us?
Why do we deal treacherously with one another
By profaning the covenant of the fathers?
…You cover the altar of the LORD with tears,
With weeping and crying;
So He does not regard the offering anymore,
Nor receive it with goodwill from your hands.
14 Yet you say, “For what reason?”
Because the LORD has been witness
Between you and the wife of your youth,
With whom you have dealt treacherously;
Yet she is your companion
And your wife by covenant.
15 But did He not make them one,
Having a remnant of the Spirit?
And why one?
He seeks godly offspring.
Therefore take heed to your spirit,
And let none deal treacherously with the wife of his youth.
16“ For the LORD God of Israel says
That He hates divorce,
For it covers one’s garment with violence,”
Says the LORD of hosts. “
Divorce sounds like an act of violence in the Bible. Hmmm….perhaps the violence to the soul is the greatest harm. The mind, the will and emotions all suffer tremendously, because of the fact a covenant is broken before God. God describes it as a ‘treacherous’ act in the Bible. Usually someone’s heart has been deceived or offended and with divorce the pain of being offended in this manner is illegal and immoral to God. Perhaps that’s why it’s also so painful. A law is broken that God has considered to be sacred.
If you have been broken by the pain of divorce, know that God is a restorer of broken and contrite spirits. Know that he has a plan and a future for you, despite all. When I look back over my past, I see divorce as a painful period during my life, but also a time to have had a new opportunity and to begin anew and be healed by God. I repented to God for breaking His precious covenant, I dwelt in sorrow, I grieved the loss…then I acquiesced. Today, I have peace.
God also made me over again and gave me new life as evidenced by where I now stand. I have come through my Red Sea.
Know Jesus…Know peace.No Jesus …No peace.
Know Jesus…Know peace.No Jesus …No peace.
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