Love & Sex Magazine

Single and Suffering

By Sophieanne139 @sophinaphalange

Posted by Sophie Westrope on July 28, 2013 · Leave a Comment 

There’s a common misconception attached to being a singleton. I mean besides the fact everybody assumes you’re miserable and have lots of cats. It’s this belief that people have that because you’re flying solo your life must be a haze of one night stands and terrible anecdotal-worthy dates. When in reality – well, in my harsh reality – it’s nothing of the sort.

Being part of a couple gives you access to a lot of activities you probably wouldn’t do if you were alone. Like spending the whole day walking around holding hands and smiling; if you do that alone you genuinely receive a lot of weird looks and eventually a one way ticket to the funny farm. And you get to cook each other dinner and coo over how much you love each other and then there’s all that hot monogamous sex too (or so I’m told..)

And while being single allows you the freedom of no pants Sundays and the ability to become as emotionally involved with an American sitcom (Mad Men and I have been going strong for a solid six months now) as you want, there are times when friends or relatives ask that dreaded question of ‘how’s your love life?’ hoping that you can share a hilarious story of the dinner date you went on last weekend with Rob from I.T with the big ears. But the sad truth is that when you pass the six month mark of being a one man band things tend to dry up on the news front. No headlines here, folks.

Being single loses it’s glow the same way that a pair of new socks don’t feel so fresh after their first wash. It’s just not the same anymore. You’re tired of it. But changing it would involve effort and as a lonely unloved individual you don’t have bags of that to go around and so you drag your sorry arse to the corner shop and buy another bag of cheese puffs hoping that you’ll bump into your future partner while in the line to buy your lottery ticket. Because the thought of doing anything about your relationship status is exhausting.

We’re single and we’re tired of it, okay couples?! So people, please PLEASE stop trying to make us leave our houses.


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